One of the best things about being single and dating is that you learn a lot about yourself. It gives you time to think about what your expectations would be for a committed relationship. You know what you would be willing to do for the right person, and what you want from the right person. It's also given me time to realize what qualities Mr. Right would have. On the other hand I've also decided what all the Mr. Wrongs would be. And I know that I wrote the other day that I wasn't going dwell on that anymore. But I just couldn't resist one last blog. So this blog will be a tribute to them. By the way there's no order to the listing they are in totally random order, and no none of them are based on any man in particular. Just me deciding what qualities I don't want and giving each one a nickname. And yes a man can have more than one of these qualities, and if you ask me more than three is pretty darn scary.
The first Mr. Wrong I'll refer to him as Mr. Intellectual Snob. This is the man that thinks he's smarter than everyone else, and at every opportunity rubs it in their face. These are the dudes that walk through art museums and galleries with their nose up in the air. A fun Sunday for them is brunch with the Sunday Times and crossword puzzle under their nose. Basically he looks down upon everyone but himself. I'm sorry but this is not attractive. No offense but I don't find dudes that insist on correcting my grammar, vocabulary, yadda yadda yadda something that I want to listen to all day long. Yes, I do consider myself smart, but at the same time I don't flash it in people that aren't as intelligent faces all day long. Because there's probably something they are better than me and I wouldn't want them doing that to me.
Next I'll go with Mr. Emotional Unavailable. Here's the guy that has commitment issues, for whatever reasons he refuses to open up. Part of him will always be emotional closed off, and he will keep a woman on a string for years, perhaps forever. The perfect example, is of course Mr. Big from Sex and the City. He kept Carrie at bay for years, and for every inch he moved forward he moved ten back. I don't think I need to explain why this isn't cool, but why not. What is the point of being in a relationship with someone that can't open up, and refuses to compromise most of the time. I have no problem giving all I have in a relationship, but I'm at the point in my life where I expect something back.
Let's go with one of my favorites, Mr. Rebound. I think every woman has gone on at least one date with this dude. This guy still hasn't dealt with his issues from a recent break-up and is looking for someone to cushion the blow. He'll sit there and talk about her all day long. I hate to give another Sex and the City reference, but it's the perfect example. Remember Burger, another one of Carrie's fledgling relationships, talk about a doomed relationship from the start. The dude still hadn't dealt with his recent break-up. Needless to say, a relationship can't get very far until a person has dealt with their recent break-up. And yes this does go both ways. Of course, this isn't a totally hopeless case, just call me after you've dealing with the issues from your last relationship.
I bet you are wondering who's next. How about Dr. Baggage? Let me guess your question, why does this one have a doctor in the title? Because he has a PhD in issues, and I'm not just talking about his love life. This is the guy that everything goes wrong for, and does nothing to fix it just complain and fret. Just think George Constanza from Seinfeld. It's not so much that things go wrong for this guy, it's just that all he's capable of doing is making his problems worse. He's one of those guys that wallows in his problems rather doing something constructive to fix them. I'm not saying I'd never date him, I just expect him to go to lots of therapy first and show me the proof. And I don't just mean showing me the bills.
Another great one, Mr. Mama's Boy. And I'm not talking about the dude that goes to Mom's once a week or calls her a few times a week. This is the guy takes it to a whole new level. Like he's afraid to take a piss without his Mom's expressed permission. Mom still buy all his clothes, washes his laundry, does his ironing, and the dude is thirty. Just think Norman Bates from Psycho. Not exactly perfect dating material if you get my drift.
I've never had the pleasure of dating one of these. Maybe living in New York has protected me somewhat, or maybe it was seeing enough 90's television. Yes it's Mr. Secretly in the Closet. You know what I'm talking about it. There's nobody better to go shopping with, and he knows all the best night spots. He never complains about planning dates, and they are not to McDonald's. And third date came and went, the dude never complained that you weren't ready yet. Just think Will from Will & Grace. Hopefully I don't need to explain why this dude is a problem. If you don't get it on your own, watch just one episode of Will & Grace.
This is an easy one, Mr. Pervert. These are the guys who watch porno non-stop, do nothing but make lewd comments about women. When you go to a dance club with your girlfriends they think it's cute to bump and grind your ass. Usually in the dance club you can spot them a mile away, just think the Roxbury Brothers. Every woman that walks past them they check out. They walk around like a stuffed turkey, the minute they walk in they scope out every woman in the bar with their signature eye roll. Then they stand in a spot where they see the front door, and they don't even look down when they sip their nasty Bud lights. Trust me if you spot one, run the other way. In fact you may even want to leave the bar.
Here's yet another easy one, Mr. Pathological Liar. Though they sometimes can be tricky to spot. These are the guys that are constantly making up stories thinking they are slick, but they always eventually get caught. Because eventually they can't remember all the lies they've told, and slip up real bad. Sometimes it's just their cockiness that gets them in the end. I'm trying to come with a good example from television or the movies but my mind is drawing a blank right now. Besides I don't think I need to explain why he's not cool to date.
Alright, next is Mr. Belittler. This is the dude that insists on putting down everything that you do. Who wants to be with someone that if you say hello the wrong way, or if your skirt is too short he's gonna snap. And often he loves to do it in public in front of other people. Personally I think he just wants to prop up his own low self-esteem. Archie Bunker and George Jefferson are the perfect examples. They were constantly putting their wives down. Just like their characters, it usually spreads over to other people in their personal lives. Usually this dude can shove but can't take it. Why wouldn't I be dying date him? Well, who wants to be personally degraded on a daily basis?
This is one of the funniest dudes on the list, Mr. Macho Man. He can usually be spotted a mile away, usually because he's so busy showing himself off. You know flashing his muscles, fancy car, expelling his masculine energy for anyone to see. Just think Steven Siegel, or if he's not your cup of tea how about Russel Crowe. I'm sure you get the picture. If you ask me these men just use their manly energy to mask their lack of self-confidence. Basically it's all bells and whistles but nothing to back it up. If you ask me it's very easy to start a bar fight, but it takes a real man to admit he made a mistake and apologize.
Last one I promise, Mr Egomaniac. This one explains itself. These are those dudes that take more time then their women to get ready. They are completely concerned with the labels they wear and the cars they drive. Just think of Gaston from Beauty and the Beast, he was totally obsessed with thinking he was the totally perfect ladies man. In the end of the movie, his ego is totally busted when she is totally repulsed by him. And in reality what woman wants to be with man that has a bigger clothing budget, uses more expensive lotions, and takes more time to get ready than her.
Next I'll go with Mr. Emotional Unavailable. Here's the guy that has commitment issues, for whatever reasons he refuses to open up. Part of him will always be emotional closed off, and he will keep a woman on a string for years, perhaps forever. The perfect example, is of course Mr. Big from Sex and the City. He kept Carrie at bay for years, and for every inch he moved forward he moved ten back. I don't think I need to explain why this isn't cool, but why not. What is the point of being in a relationship with someone that can't open up, and refuses to compromise most of the time. I have no problem giving all I have in a relationship, but I'm at the point in my life where I expect something back.
Let's go with one of my favorites, Mr. Rebound. I think every woman has gone on at least one date with this dude. This guy still hasn't dealt with his issues from a recent break-up and is looking for someone to cushion the blow. He'll sit there and talk about her all day long. I hate to give another Sex and the City reference, but it's the perfect example. Remember Burger, another one of Carrie's fledgling relationships, talk about a doomed relationship from the start. The dude still hadn't dealt with his recent break-up. Needless to say, a relationship can't get very far until a person has dealt with their recent break-up. And yes this does go both ways. Of course, this isn't a totally hopeless case, just call me after you've dealing with the issues from your last relationship.
I bet you are wondering who's next. How about Dr. Baggage? Let me guess your question, why does this one have a doctor in the title? Because he has a PhD in issues, and I'm not just talking about his love life. This is the guy that everything goes wrong for, and does nothing to fix it just complain and fret. Just think George Constanza from Seinfeld. It's not so much that things go wrong for this guy, it's just that all he's capable of doing is making his problems worse. He's one of those guys that wallows in his problems rather doing something constructive to fix them. I'm not saying I'd never date him, I just expect him to go to lots of therapy first and show me the proof. And I don't just mean showing me the bills.
Another great one, Mr. Mama's Boy. And I'm not talking about the dude that goes to Mom's once a week or calls her a few times a week. This is the guy takes it to a whole new level. Like he's afraid to take a piss without his Mom's expressed permission. Mom still buy all his clothes, washes his laundry, does his ironing, and the dude is thirty. Just think Norman Bates from Psycho. Not exactly perfect dating material if you get my drift.
I've never had the pleasure of dating one of these. Maybe living in New York has protected me somewhat, or maybe it was seeing enough 90's television. Yes it's Mr. Secretly in the Closet. You know what I'm talking about it. There's nobody better to go shopping with, and he knows all the best night spots. He never complains about planning dates, and they are not to McDonald's. And third date came and went, the dude never complained that you weren't ready yet. Just think Will from Will & Grace. Hopefully I don't need to explain why this dude is a problem. If you don't get it on your own, watch just one episode of Will & Grace.
This is an easy one, Mr. Pervert. These are the guys who watch porno non-stop, do nothing but make lewd comments about women. When you go to a dance club with your girlfriends they think it's cute to bump and grind your ass. Usually in the dance club you can spot them a mile away, just think the Roxbury Brothers. Every woman that walks past them they check out. They walk around like a stuffed turkey, the minute they walk in they scope out every woman in the bar with their signature eye roll. Then they stand in a spot where they see the front door, and they don't even look down when they sip their nasty Bud lights. Trust me if you spot one, run the other way. In fact you may even want to leave the bar.
Here's yet another easy one, Mr. Pathological Liar. Though they sometimes can be tricky to spot. These are the guys that are constantly making up stories thinking they are slick, but they always eventually get caught. Because eventually they can't remember all the lies they've told, and slip up real bad. Sometimes it's just their cockiness that gets them in the end. I'm trying to come with a good example from television or the movies but my mind is drawing a blank right now. Besides I don't think I need to explain why he's not cool to date.
Alright, next is Mr. Belittler. This is the dude that insists on putting down everything that you do. Who wants to be with someone that if you say hello the wrong way, or if your skirt is too short he's gonna snap. And often he loves to do it in public in front of other people. Personally I think he just wants to prop up his own low self-esteem. Archie Bunker and George Jefferson are the perfect examples. They were constantly putting their wives down. Just like their characters, it usually spreads over to other people in their personal lives. Usually this dude can shove but can't take it. Why wouldn't I be dying date him? Well, who wants to be personally degraded on a daily basis?
This is one of the funniest dudes on the list, Mr. Macho Man. He can usually be spotted a mile away, usually because he's so busy showing himself off. You know flashing his muscles, fancy car, expelling his masculine energy for anyone to see. Just think Steven Siegel, or if he's not your cup of tea how about Russel Crowe. I'm sure you get the picture. If you ask me these men just use their manly energy to mask their lack of self-confidence. Basically it's all bells and whistles but nothing to back it up. If you ask me it's very easy to start a bar fight, but it takes a real man to admit he made a mistake and apologize.
Last one I promise, Mr Egomaniac. This one explains itself. These are those dudes that take more time then their women to get ready. They are completely concerned with the labels they wear and the cars they drive. Just think of Gaston from Beauty and the Beast, he was totally obsessed with thinking he was the totally perfect ladies man. In the end of the movie, his ego is totally busted when she is totally repulsed by him. And in reality what woman wants to be with man that has a bigger clothing budget, uses more expensive lotions, and takes more time to get ready than her.
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