Disclaimer: I know what the fuck does that title mean. It seems like none of my titles make any sense lately. What can I say it came to my mind when I was writing my blog. I thought it was from a song I was listening to, but it turns out it's not. Knowing me I was probably confusing song lyrics again. I know you find it funny when I mix up the lyrics, but you can stop your snickering now.
I know that's a pretty broad statement, and it could mean anything. But if you think about it people really are strange, we become creatures of habit. I know, I know what the hell is this chick mumbling about now. Maybe to a certain extent I'm not totally sure, but am I ever really totally sure. Anyway I guess why the title inspired me, is because sometimes the answer to something is right between our eyes. But we don't see it, because after all it's between our eyes. You know that uncomfortable feeling you get when you know you have an eyelash caught between your eyes but you can't see it. After all how can you see something that's between your eyes.
This probably still doesn't make any sense I know it doesn't to me, and I writing this drivel. Maybe what I'm trying to say is that sometimes the answer to something is right in front of our faces but we can't just can't see it. Sometimes it's just because we make things a lot more difficult then it has to be. Not on purpose, but because we can't accept that something can be so easy. So in our subconscious mind we make things much more difficult and complicated then they need to be. Part of it I think is because we are taught that anything worth isn't easy. And often the hardest part is accepting that if you want something and go after it is that you can have it. The hardest part often is just believing in ourselves, because for many years we are conditioned not to. So we up all these complicated reasons why things we want can't work. A lot times they are just in our own minds.
After all isn't ask and you shall receive? Now where was that from again, wasn't it a book or something? It wasn't Shakespeare, hmmm I guess I could google it, oh well. Anyway, sometimes all we have to ask for what we want. I think the hardest part is the fear of the rejection. Sometimes we are so afraid that we throw away something good because we are so scared of rejection. And our fear blind sights us to the easier solution right between our eyes. So instead we create these really complicated responses, out of fear. Because we think it's easier, but instead we just make things just that much more difficult. Maybe that's why they say nothing worth it is easy. Because we have to realize that it's very difficult to get what we really want without getting over our fears. Maybe that's reason FDR said the only thing to fear is fear itself. The challenge isn't jumping over the hurdles, but getting over the fear that prevents us from jumping over the hurdles. Remember ask and you shall receive. I guess I'm gonna have to take my own advice. To be honest I'm a little afraid of that asking part, too.
April 30, 2007
If Everyone Cared
Today is one of those picture perfect postcard days. There are few scattered white puffy clouds along the horizon. I've never really seen too many lighter clouds higher up in the skies, the higher up skies seem reserved for heavier clouds. I'm not really sure why, but I think I vaguely remember there being a reason. And today I noticed that the skies were a lighter blue towards the bottom of the sky and gradually became a darker blue as it went higher towards the sky. It surprised me that I never noticed that before. I guess what they say about if you don't pay attention you can miss the little things is true. In a way it's kinda a shame how we walk around everyday and never take the time to sit back and appreciate the beauty of the everyday small things. Maybe if we did we would appreciate our world a little more, and maybe would spend less time polluting it. After all look at all the good stuff we get from this little planet called Earth.
Up on the Clouds
Today is one of those days that you wish you could spend all day outside lounging around on hammock... It's kinda funny, that I say that because after about a half an hour I would probably get so damn figgity... But it definetly is the perfect day for laying back and cloud watching... There are blue skies... A lots of small scattered white puffy clouds... The perfect day for sitting back staring at the skies and see what you can find in the clouds... And of course lots of day dreaming... If you haven't been able to tell already I love to day dream... Maybe it because I can never remember my regular dreams... Or maybe there just isn't a reason... Does anyone really need a reason to dream... After all if you can't think of a brighter future what do you really have to look forward to... To stretch that extra mile...
Manic Monday
Sometimes at sit at this screen, and I just wonder what should I write about... It's funny sometimes how your mind draws a total blank... but at the same time it's spinning round and round... I think I just have too many different thoughts from all different directions bouncing around my head... There are days were it seems like there's a ping pong ball or something in there... Or maybe the hamster on my wheel just won't get off... Which is funny because sometimes I'm just so blond... Maybe it's not so much that... I would say more like ditzy... If that is a real word... I know this blog is going nowhere fast... But it is Monday morning... So cut me some slack... If you want I'll call this one quits... Maybe my head is like the song... I always did love that song...
April 27, 2007
The American Dream...
Life... Liberty... The pursuit of happiness... Isn't that the American Dream... At least that's what they wrote in the Declaration of Independence... I think somewhere along the way it changed... The American people became a little lost... Other things got in the way... The fantasy of the white picket fence at any cost... Of keeping up with the Joneses... Rather than think about what they really want out of life...
And somewhere along the way the American Dream became to go to college... for an education... and a get a good job... Somehow I think the Founding Fathers are rolling over in their graves... Disgraced at the fact that Americans would think that the only purpose to an education was to get a good job and not to widen their small little view of the world...
After all they fought so hard for our free education system... And would be disgraced to see that most Americans just use it to trap themselves in a corporate prison for life... After all that the Founding Fathers would be disgusted because We the People have forgotten the value of freedom... Because it's easier to become a bunch of Couch Potato Pussies... For the "Modern American Dream"... But We the People have totally forgot about the first American Dream...
And somewhere along the way the American Dream became to go to college... for an education... and a get a good job... Somehow I think the Founding Fathers are rolling over in their graves... Disgraced at the fact that Americans would think that the only purpose to an education was to get a good job and not to widen their small little view of the world...
After all they fought so hard for our free education system... And would be disgraced to see that most Americans just use it to trap themselves in a corporate prison for life... After all that the Founding Fathers would be disgusted because We the People have forgotten the value of freedom... Because it's easier to become a bunch of Couch Potato Pussies... For the "Modern American Dream"... But We the People have totally forgot about the first American Dream...
Give A Little Bit
Sometimes it seems like when I'm trying not to make the same mistakes in my life, the more I make the same mistakes. I'm sure you are wondering what the fuck is this chick talking about? Well, I've always been a thinker not a doer. Probably not that big a surprise after seeing how many blogs I write. Almost every single action I've taken in my life has been premeditated. I've always been that type of person. Off the top of my head, there's only one time in my life where I did something without fully thinking it out first. And that was at a point where I wanted to make a dramatic change in my life.
Usually if I'm not sure of something like 99%, I will not act on it. It's just the way I am, recently I have tried to change it. But maybe it's time I accept myself for who I am. Others have had trouble accepting that about me, too. People have tried to get me to react a certain way. Perhaps I'm strange but usually when someone prods me in a certain direction, I will go in the exact opposite direction. It could be just part of my stubborn streak. Or maybe it's just because I'm determined to stick out like a sore thumb. At the end of the day I refuse to be just a member of the herd. A lot of people have tried to shake me out of my stubborn streak but to be honest it's usually just made me more so. The funny thing is that I probably would have seen it their way sooner if they just left me be.
Usually if I'm not sure of something like 99%, I will not act on it. It's just the way I am, recently I have tried to change it. But maybe it's time I accept myself for who I am. Others have had trouble accepting that about me, too. People have tried to get me to react a certain way. Perhaps I'm strange but usually when someone prods me in a certain direction, I will go in the exact opposite direction. It could be just part of my stubborn streak. Or maybe it's just because I'm determined to stick out like a sore thumb. At the end of the day I refuse to be just a member of the herd. A lot of people have tried to shake me out of my stubborn streak but to be honest it's usually just made me more so. The funny thing is that I probably would have seen it their way sooner if they just left me be.
The Ugly Duckling...
It seems like everytime I go outside today it starts to rain again... It happened this morning... At lunch when it was time for me to go back to work it stopped raining... And then just now it was raining again... Maybe it's the universe's way of trying to help me over rain making me sluggish... The ironic thing is that when it's yucky weather out I feel trapped at my desk... As long as it's not pouring I'll go outside and walk... So it's kinda funny that rain makes me so sluggish... Anyway when I went outside the swans were outside in the drizzly rain... I guess it doesn't bother them much at all... After all they do live in the water... So it would be pretty silly for a little rain to bother them... Actually they didn't seem to mind at all... Either they were napping or swimming in the water and drinking...
With them were these two baby swans... And I didn't realize that they didn't have all white feathers when they were small... The only feathers they had that were white were on their bellies and the rest were all black... They were cute in this goofy funny looking sorta way... Maybe there's some truth to the story... I always related to it as a child... As a child it always felt like I didn't belong anywhere I went... It seemed like I was picked last at everything... My family well I just never related to them... And where I wasn't the ugliest child, well I certainly wasn't the most attractive... When I read the story I related to that poor bird... I wanted to grow to be like the swan... Grow and be beautiful... So beautiful that everyone envied it... Obviously I don't still think that way... Besides I was like six... I didn't know any better... That wanting someone to envy you isn't cool... But maybe that does explain why I like watching the swans so much... I've never really thought about it before...
With them were these two baby swans... And I didn't realize that they didn't have all white feathers when they were small... The only feathers they had that were white were on their bellies and the rest were all black... They were cute in this goofy funny looking sorta way... Maybe there's some truth to the story... I always related to it as a child... As a child it always felt like I didn't belong anywhere I went... It seemed like I was picked last at everything... My family well I just never related to them... And where I wasn't the ugliest child, well I certainly wasn't the most attractive... When I read the story I related to that poor bird... I wanted to grow to be like the swan... Grow and be beautiful... So beautiful that everyone envied it... Obviously I don't still think that way... Besides I was like six... I didn't know any better... That wanting someone to envy you isn't cool... But maybe that does explain why I like watching the swans so much... I've never really thought about it before...
Everything Has Balance
My last blog really got me to thinking. I've always used the expression yin and yang, and always thought the design was really cool. But after a few minutes ponderings I realized that I really didn't know much about it. So you guessed it, I decided to check it out one of new favorite websites.
It's actually pretty cool they are opposite but complementary in nature. Wow, Yin actually means shady place. It's the dark, passive and feminine element. Yang means sunny place and is active, light, and masculine. According to the article they are not in absolutes, and any force in nature has yin and yang elements. So I guess I wasn't totally off in my last blog. Here's where the article goes into philosophy and I get a little lost. In college when I had to read all that Plato and Socrates in philosophy class I was more than a little perplexed. The interdependent thing makes lots of sense. I'm surprised but I never really understood this point before, they apparently can transform each other. Like night becomes day. One other key point is that there there are aspects of each in the other. Darkness has some light in it, when you think about it is somewhat self-explanatory. Overall it was a pretty interesting article. Maybe at some point I'll look more into it.
It's actually pretty cool they are opposite but complementary in nature. Wow, Yin actually means shady place. It's the dark, passive and feminine element. Yang means sunny place and is active, light, and masculine. According to the article they are not in absolutes, and any force in nature has yin and yang elements. So I guess I wasn't totally off in my last blog. Here's where the article goes into philosophy and I get a little lost. In college when I had to read all that Plato and Socrates in philosophy class I was more than a little perplexed. The interdependent thing makes lots of sense. I'm surprised but I never really understood this point before, they apparently can transform each other. Like night becomes day. One other key point is that there there are aspects of each in the other. Darkness has some light in it, when you think about it is somewhat self-explanatory. Overall it was a pretty interesting article. Maybe at some point I'll look more into it.
Yin and Yang...
There's something about the drizzling rain on the beach... I can't quite explain it but there's something calming about it... Maybe it's the quietness of it or just that there were these big huge waves that just came through... And now it's much more sedate... In some ways the before and after a stormis a lot like a yin and a yang... They are opposites... but they pull towards each other... And you can't have one without the other...
Nature has it's own way of putting things back into the natural order of things... Like there's this one spot along the beach where a river forms after a big storm... It's probably nature's way of draining out the beach from all the water... If you think about it, it's pretty cool how that happens... I can't think of any other instances right now but I'm sure that there are others... Not really something to stress over... It's only a blog after all...
Nature has it's own way of putting things back into the natural order of things... Like there's this one spot along the beach where a river forms after a big storm... It's probably nature's way of draining out the beach from all the water... If you think about it, it's pretty cool how that happens... I can't think of any other instances right now but I'm sure that there are others... Not really something to stress over... It's only a blog after all...
Hang on Tooth and Nail
I'm not sure why but there's something about rain that makes me feel sluggish... Almost lethargic... I'm not quite sure why... There's something about rain that just makes me sleepy... On rainy mornings like today I've always had to force myself out of bed... To be honest it's a little surprising because I've never really had a strong hatred or anything like that for rain... In fact I've always thought it was hot to make out in the rain... Even hotter to have sex in the rain... And come to think of it... I don't particularily remember doing either... I know I make it sound like I get around... I'm not really like that... It's just that I have a lot erotic thoughts... And I could never be the type of person that could sleep around a lot... but with the right person I can be very sensual... Of course I still haven't been with that right person... And yes I do believe they are out there... There's somebody for everyone... I think it's more a question of when you find that right someone of being able to compromise to make it work... After all like the old song says it takes two... I guess I need to remember that I can be little stubborn sometimes... Hey at least I can admit it... Some people can't even do that... Besides it's a step in the right direction...
Now I'm Fully Grown and I know Where It's At
I know I've written a lot lately... There's something about blogging that I can't quite explain... It does help me get my thoughts together... That and walking I seem to do a lot of my best thinking... Now if I could blog and walk at the same time... Now that could be a good thing or depending on the situation it might be a bad thing... I'm not really sure what all this rambling is about or where it came from... But you're right I'm not sure how that's different than usual... Maybe my thoughts are just jumbled right now... And no I don't know where the title came from... The song came on and I couldn't decide whether or not I should un-rate it...
Where was I... Oh yes random jumbled thoughts... And your crack about how is that different from the rest of my thoughts isn't exactly appreciated... Besides should you really talk... Is there really anyone who should... Because after all isn't the human brain pretty random to begin with it... In some ways it's the best thing about how our minds work... But at the same time it's one of the worst things... I know I'm weird... but then again you are reading this drivel... Should you really be talking... Maybe this is another blog that I should just accept as a loss... Because even I don't see where this is going anymore... And it doesn't even make any sense...
Where was I... Oh yes random jumbled thoughts... And your crack about how is that different from the rest of my thoughts isn't exactly appreciated... Besides should you really talk... Is there really anyone who should... Because after all isn't the human brain pretty random to begin with it... In some ways it's the best thing about how our minds work... But at the same time it's one of the worst things... I know I'm weird... but then again you are reading this drivel... Should you really be talking... Maybe this is another blog that I should just accept as a loss... Because even I don't see where this is going anymore... And it doesn't even make any sense...
April 26, 2007
Random Thoughts
After my last blog, I've done some thinking. No, not about karma, looking that up led me to think about other topics. You probably are happy about that, not that I can blame you even I was tired of my long blog droning on about karma. Actually after reading the article on karma it led me to wonder about the afterlife. Yes, I do think about such things every once in awhile. While discussing the topic of karma, the article described how some religions believe in multiple lives or reincarnation. There have been several times in my life where I have wondered whether or not reincarnation has any truth behind it. Most of the times after I questioned it I would say I should research that, but I was just too lazy to do the follow up research.
I know why would I question the possibility of multiple lives? Mostly because I've on several occasions I've had the experience of deva vu. You that feeling that you've been somewhere, or met someone, or even had a conversation before. And it was kinda freaky because on the majority of those occasions I know for a fact that it was something that never happened before. Alright, you want examples for some reason my mind is drawing a blank. Well there was this one time where I met someone and we both remembered meeting each other before but couldn't figure out where. And we went over almost everything that we've done in our lives, schoools, jobs, neighborhoods, friends, yadda yadda yadda. If you ask me that's weird as hell.
That's the only one I can remember the specifics of but there definetly have been places that I've gone to and then said to myself I've been before. And then there have been times where I have had conversations with people and then say didn't we talk about this already. Of course, they would swear left, right, upside down, yadda yadda yadda that we never had that conversation before. I've always found that kinda thing kinda strange.
I know why would I question the possibility of multiple lives? Mostly because I've on several occasions I've had the experience of deva vu. You that feeling that you've been somewhere, or met someone, or even had a conversation before. And it was kinda freaky because on the majority of those occasions I know for a fact that it was something that never happened before. Alright, you want examples for some reason my mind is drawing a blank. Well there was this one time where I met someone and we both remembered meeting each other before but couldn't figure out where. And we went over almost everything that we've done in our lives, schoools, jobs, neighborhoods, friends, yadda yadda yadda. If you ask me that's weird as hell.
That's the only one I can remember the specifics of but there definetly have been places that I've gone to and then said to myself I've been before. And then there have been times where I have had conversations with people and then say didn't we talk about this already. Of course, they would swear left, right, upside down, yadda yadda yadda that we never had that conversation before. I've always found that kinda thing kinda strange.
Take a Deeper Look
For some reason this past week, I've had several different conversations about the effects of karma on one's life. One of them was a totally lighthearted conversation and the other one wasn't quite what I would call intense but it was close. I was explaining how I wasn't comfortable with something because it would give me bad personal karma and two things that they replied with made me uncomfortable. One they said that if I didn't talk about it, it wouldn't give me bad karma. I was like what the fuck. Sorry, but karma is totally a case of actions speak louder than words. Don't get me wrong, words are important but your actions are more important. In this instance once you do it, it's done and your karma is immediately damaged. It's kinda like that tree that falls in the forest, if no one is there to hear it, doesn't it still fall?
The other thing they said that bothered me somewhat is that they compared karma to guilt. I can't say why it bothered me, but I guess I just I felt they were implying that I was using karma as excuse. Maybe some people do but I wasn't. Or maybe in some way karma is somewhat related to guilt. Let's face it we do use it to explain our conscience, to either rationalize or unrationalize our actions as the case may be.
This probably is a good thing to check out on wikipedia, let's see what it says. It basically defines karma as, Karma is a sum of all that an individual has done, is currently doing and will do. Karma is not about retribution, vengeance, punishment or reward; karma simply deals with what is. The effects of all deeds actively create past, present and future experiences, thus making one responsible for one's own life, and the pain and joy it brings to others. In religions that incorporate reincarnation, karma extends through one's present life and all past and future lives as well. It is cumulative. If you ask me that sounds pretty intense, almost sounds like one can't repair their karma. That was word for word from the article by the way. I should have known this was gonna go into religion. I may have to read it more than once, all the terminology usually goes over my head. Stop snikering at the short joke.
If this doesn't show how actions effect things in your life nothing else will. According to the Vedas, if we sow goodness, we will reap goodness; if we sow evil, we will reap evil. Karma refers to the totality of our actions and their concomitant reactions in this and previous lives, all of which determines our future. The conquest of karma lies in intelligent action and dispassionate response. Karma is not punishment or retribution, but simply an extended expression or consequences, of natural acts. That is to say, a particular action now is not binding to some particular, pre-determined future experience or reaction; it is not a simple, one-to-one correspondence of reward or punishment. This explains it to me a lot clearer, for some reason I always felt karma was directly related at times to a particular event. Alright I can be honest after awhile I started to skim the article, it's pretty darn long. But after reading it I can't help but to think about my actions a little bit differently.
The other thing they said that bothered me somewhat is that they compared karma to guilt. I can't say why it bothered me, but I guess I just I felt they were implying that I was using karma as excuse. Maybe some people do but I wasn't. Or maybe in some way karma is somewhat related to guilt. Let's face it we do use it to explain our conscience, to either rationalize or unrationalize our actions as the case may be.
This probably is a good thing to check out on wikipedia, let's see what it says. It basically defines karma as, Karma is a sum of all that an individual has done, is currently doing and will do. Karma is not about retribution, vengeance, punishment or reward; karma simply deals with what is. The effects of all deeds actively create past, present and future experiences, thus making one responsible for one's own life, and the pain and joy it brings to others. In religions that incorporate reincarnation, karma extends through one's present life and all past and future lives as well. It is cumulative. If you ask me that sounds pretty intense, almost sounds like one can't repair their karma. That was word for word from the article by the way. I should have known this was gonna go into religion. I may have to read it more than once, all the terminology usually goes over my head. Stop snikering at the short joke.
If this doesn't show how actions effect things in your life nothing else will. According to the Vedas, if we sow goodness, we will reap goodness; if we sow evil, we will reap evil. Karma refers to the totality of our actions and their concomitant reactions in this and previous lives, all of which determines our future. The conquest of karma lies in intelligent action and dispassionate response. Karma is not punishment or retribution, but simply an extended expression or consequences, of natural acts. That is to say, a particular action now is not binding to some particular, pre-determined future experience or reaction; it is not a simple, one-to-one correspondence of reward or punishment. This explains it to me a lot clearer, for some reason I always felt karma was directly related at times to a particular event. Alright I can be honest after awhile I started to skim the article, it's pretty darn long. But after reading it I can't help but to think about my actions a little bit differently.
All in a Day's Blog
Disclaimer: I'm not really sure what the title means... I just wanted to write a blog with all my annoyances... Disclaimers...Dots... And rainbow fonts... I just wanted to annoy my readers... What can I say... It's just one of my many talents... Maybe I'll add some songs so I can be super annoying...
You're a real tough cookie with a long history... Hit me with your best shot... go ahead... Is really smart to encourage a man to start throwing punches... Hit your best shot... It probably wouldn't get you anywhere good... Actually I know it won't get you anywhere good. Before I put another notch in my lipstick case... Fire away... Actually that sounds more like encouraging him to use a weapon rather than hit...Hit me with your best shot...
Living my life in a slow hell... Haven't seen the sun shine in a few days... I wonder if I'll ever change my ways... ahhh a happy love song... I can't look at you while lying next to her... Sat down and cried today... yup definetly cheerful... Everyone knows but they won't tell... Just ain't right... Three Damn nights... put picture away... can't look at you while lying next to him... oh yeah these two are totally screwed up... sounds like a really bad soap opera... Saw you yesterday with an old friend... Since you've been gone my world is dark and gray... Off to drink you away... Oh yeah their situation is very happy (eye roll)... I swear I've changed my ways... Always famous last words... Found your picture today...Come back home
You're a real tough cookie with a long history... Hit me with your best shot... go ahead... Is really smart to encourage a man to start throwing punches... Hit your best shot... It probably wouldn't get you anywhere good... Actually I know it won't get you anywhere good. Before I put another notch in my lipstick case... Fire away... Actually that sounds more like encouraging him to use a weapon rather than hit...Hit me with your best shot...
Living my life in a slow hell... Haven't seen the sun shine in a few days... I wonder if I'll ever change my ways... ahhh a happy love song... I can't look at you while lying next to her... Sat down and cried today... yup definetly cheerful... Everyone knows but they won't tell... Just ain't right... Three Damn nights... put picture away... can't look at you while lying next to him... oh yeah these two are totally screwed up... sounds like a really bad soap opera... Saw you yesterday with an old friend... Since you've been gone my world is dark and gray... Off to drink you away... Oh yeah their situation is very happy (eye roll)... I swear I've changed my ways... Always famous last words... Found your picture today...Come back home
Splish Spalsh
On a day like today there's nothing like the quiet serenity of the ocean... There's something to be said about the peacefullness of watching the waves hit the shore... Today the edges of the water had this clear white foam... And a couple of swans were hanging out along the shoreline... The water was a beautiful shade of blue... Up above the skies were wide and open... There were some scattered clouds throughout the sky... It wasn't quite as beautiful as the rest of this past week along the water... But it still was a beautiful morning...
There's always been a couple of things that I found rather curious about the beach here... Well I've never really seen any seaweed along the beach... I've spotted some stick-like things along the beach that the swans seem to eat... but they don't seem like dried seaweed... It looks a lot more like hay... The other thing that has me a little curious... There never seem to be any shells strew along the sand... Not even broken ones... Granted I've seen a few along the walk path... But those were from the gulls breaking them for food... I guess it just seems strange to not have any along the sand... Especially since I've seen them at nearby Manhattan Beach...
There's always been a couple of things that I found rather curious about the beach here... Well I've never really seen any seaweed along the beach... I've spotted some stick-like things along the beach that the swans seem to eat... but they don't seem like dried seaweed... It looks a lot more like hay... The other thing that has me a little curious... There never seem to be any shells strew along the sand... Not even broken ones... Granted I've seen a few along the walk path... But those were from the gulls breaking them for food... I guess it just seems strange to not have any along the sand... Especially since I've seen them at nearby Manhattan Beach...
Before the Lightening Fades
To me Spring is one of the most beautiful times of year. It's wonderful watching everything grow and begin again. To me it seems that everyone is happier during the Springtime, even the bird's chirps are sharper. Maybe it has something to do with the long cold spell of winter being over. Or maybe there's just something infectus about watching all those flowers and trees bloom. After all they say that everyone falls in love during the Spring. I guess there's something truth to that, but I honestly don't remember ever falling in love during the Spring. Though if you fall in love enough times it's bound to happen.
It's kinda weird, or maybe I'm just a little weird. When I hear the term falling in love I think of young puppy love. You know like those pictures you sometimes see on cards of the little kids kissing. I guess the reason why is after a certain age do you really say I'm falling in love, at least in my personal experience. It kinda you know just happens, at least that's the way it's been for me. Maybe because when I was younger it was something that I was just more aware of, or maybe just looked at with more innonence. The older you get, at least in my personal experience, the less innocently you look at love. I guess something is lost when you don't look at love with innonence. But something is also gained with experience. I guess it would be great if there was a way to combine the two.
It's kinda weird, or maybe I'm just a little weird. When I hear the term falling in love I think of young puppy love. You know like those pictures you sometimes see on cards of the little kids kissing. I guess the reason why is after a certain age do you really say I'm falling in love, at least in my personal experience. It kinda you know just happens, at least that's the way it's been for me. Maybe because when I was younger it was something that I was just more aware of, or maybe just looked at with more innonence. The older you get, at least in my personal experience, the less innocently you look at love. I guess something is lost when you don't look at love with innonence. But something is also gained with experience. I guess it would be great if there was a way to combine the two.
April 25, 2007
Let's Do It
Disclaimer: I know it's been awhile... It's just that usually I write other blogs instead... And usually what happens is I save it... And then it just gets buried behind a whole bunch of blogs... I can't believe you read the dribble in the song game blogs... Sometimes I wonder what I'm doing writing them... But I find them entertaining... But most of all... I just love using the dots... Maybe I'll do this too in rainbow today what the hell... How cool would it be if I used every color... Let's start at the bottom...
Actually the changing colors is a really cool effect... Maybe I should this more often in my blogs... I know I'm entertained easily... But how difficult is it to entertain you if read this blog... Then again you should have something better to do with your time... So should I... I'm supposed to be working... I bet you would like a song now...
Here goes the first one... Got those highway blues... Foot on the floor... I spent the motor running... Hey I was just blogging earlier today about a road trip... too bad purple ain't a great font color for a road trip... Moving so fast you can barely see me... Can't stop... Figures it's a guy they love to speed... Rocking down the highway... Ohhh Rocking down the highway... I wonder if they are smoking too... it's the doobie's after all...
Blue jean baby... pretty eyes... paris smiled... married a music man... Elton John songs usually make more sense... Jesus freak out in the street... handing tickets out for gold... she just laughs... the boulevard is not that bad... speak for yourself dude... The word she knows... the tune she hums... only you and you can't hear me... Slowly... Hold me closer tiny dancer... Lay me down... Kinda funny when you think about Elton John singing about a chick like that... I know I'm weird... Should you really talk... You are reading this after all... Pretty eyes... Paris Smiled... I'm curious what does pretty eyes have to do with Paris smiling... Tiny Dancer in my hand... In my hand... That is strange... Is that like Honey I shrunk the kids kinda thing... Tiny Dancer... Count the headlights on the highway... Why is this song seem so damn long... hmm hmm
I know you're home... You left your light on... The night is thin... I know you are alone... Your lover is gone... Let me in... I remember when this song came out I didn't suspect that it was about a chick... I want to come over... It's a need I can't explain... Doing a chick... I don't think so... he better be pretty hot for me do a chick... and he better return the favor... if you know what I mean... wink wink... That's all I believe... I want to come over... It's a need I can't explain... A lot of needs can't be explained... I know that you are shaking... of course she's afraid of coming out of the closet... Lover don't sleep... Let me in... I want to come over... The hell with the consequences... A need I can't explain... Those usually are the best kinds...
This always was one of my favorite Clapton songs... If not my favorite... Even though it's a little long... It's late in the evening... She wondering what clothes to wear... What is with dudes and when women are getting ready accept it we take awhile... You look wonderful tonight... We'll go to a party... This beautiful lady... This is the only Clapton song where he's singing about love and sounds happy... How much I love you... It's good to hear him sound happy... I wonder who it's about... No I'm not a gossip... And you shouldn't talk Blondie... You look wonderful tonight... You look wonderful tonight... It's kinda sweet actually... I know I'm really a pile of mush on the inside... Don't tell anyone... Alright maybe sappy... what can I say I'm a hopeless romantic...
We passed him on the stairs... although... he said I was his friend... Alright I am missing a lot of words but it's Kurt Cobain for fucks sake... So quit your snickering... Made my way back home... years and years... A long time ago... Alright you caught me... I miss a few for dramatic effect.. I must keep you on your toes after all... wow that actuallly was a pretty long solo... no I'm not keep this color very long... I must keep you on your toes though...
Besides this one may be worse... I walk a lonely road... I don't know where it goes... But I know I walk alone... Ok I'm torturing myself now... My shadow is the only one that walks besides me... Sometimes I wish someone will find me... Till then I walk alone... Walking down the line... Divides me somewhere in mind... What's fucked up and everything is alright... My shadow is the only thing that walks besides me... That's kinda depressing... I wouldn't want to walk alone... Not much fun fucking with my shadow... Much more fun fucking with another person... Not that type of fucking you pervert... By the way you are not allowed to be a bigger pervert then me... What's that about catching up... You may have that backwards...
Love this song... yeah ooh... hey little ladies there's a cool young dude... girl with a jacked up dress... yeah i know I'm weird... but I always liked this song... from Saturday morning videos... I was like 13... Is it you I'm thinking of... You got the itch... And I got it too... You make it alright... I can't control myself... I know what you've been waiting for... What's my heart waiting for... Is it you I'm thinking of... It's another sappy song I know... Almost forget to change... Fall into love... I can't stop falling into love... what's my heart dreaming of... who's that falling in love... you that I've been thinking of... keep falling into love...
Stay just a bit longer... Motor don't... take a little time and leave it all behind... Stay just a bit longer... Say that you will... jackson browne is pretty cool... stay just a little bit longer... brother's don't mind... oh that that's mother... I'm a dope... shut up Blondie... piano solo... very cool... oh it's over what a waste of font easy on the eyes... oh well tough for you...
I got another confession to make... Well be abuse... the best of you...the best of you... Are you gone and on to someone new... something that I didn't have... Too Strong to lose... At least it's only one depressing love song so far... the best of you... I know I'm obessed with happy love songs... I know but not spell check... Faith it's really the pain you feel... a broken heart isn't that bad... he makes it sound so painful... but falling in love is so much fun... it's worth the chance of getting pain... there's nothing like that first kiss... The best the best of you...
Last one I'll continue next time with whichever color I left with... I better make this a good song... This one rocks... I would climb any mountain... sail across a stormy sea... the woman in you brings out the man in me... Feels the first time... The very first time... Spend time so foolishly... What's with people obssessing with the first time... It's really not that big deal... like the song says... with the right person it should always feel that way... Feels like the first time... Feels like the first time... Open up the door... Feels like the first time... They repeat that a lot don't they... Feels like the first time...
Actually the changing colors is a really cool effect... Maybe I should this more often in my blogs... I know I'm entertained easily... But how difficult is it to entertain you if read this blog... Then again you should have something better to do with your time... So should I... I'm supposed to be working... I bet you would like a song now...
Here goes the first one... Got those highway blues... Foot on the floor... I spent the motor running... Hey I was just blogging earlier today about a road trip... too bad purple ain't a great font color for a road trip... Moving so fast you can barely see me... Can't stop... Figures it's a guy they love to speed... Rocking down the highway... Ohhh Rocking down the highway... I wonder if they are smoking too... it's the doobie's after all...
Blue jean baby... pretty eyes... paris smiled... married a music man... Elton John songs usually make more sense... Jesus freak out in the street... handing tickets out for gold... she just laughs... the boulevard is not that bad... speak for yourself dude... The word she knows... the tune she hums... only you and you can't hear me... Slowly... Hold me closer tiny dancer... Lay me down... Kinda funny when you think about Elton John singing about a chick like that... I know I'm weird... Should you really talk... You are reading this after all... Pretty eyes... Paris Smiled... I'm curious what does pretty eyes have to do with Paris smiling... Tiny Dancer in my hand... In my hand... That is strange... Is that like Honey I shrunk the kids kinda thing... Tiny Dancer... Count the headlights on the highway... Why is this song seem so damn long... hmm hmm
I know you're home... You left your light on... The night is thin... I know you are alone... Your lover is gone... Let me in... I remember when this song came out I didn't suspect that it was about a chick... I want to come over... It's a need I can't explain... Doing a chick... I don't think so... he better be pretty hot for me do a chick... and he better return the favor... if you know what I mean... wink wink... That's all I believe... I want to come over... It's a need I can't explain... A lot of needs can't be explained... I know that you are shaking... of course she's afraid of coming out of the closet... Lover don't sleep... Let me in... I want to come over... The hell with the consequences... A need I can't explain... Those usually are the best kinds...
This always was one of my favorite Clapton songs... If not my favorite... Even though it's a little long... It's late in the evening... She wondering what clothes to wear... What is with dudes and when women are getting ready accept it we take awhile... You look wonderful tonight... We'll go to a party... This beautiful lady... This is the only Clapton song where he's singing about love and sounds happy... How much I love you... It's good to hear him sound happy... I wonder who it's about... No I'm not a gossip... And you shouldn't talk Blondie... You look wonderful tonight... You look wonderful tonight... It's kinda sweet actually... I know I'm really a pile of mush on the inside... Don't tell anyone... Alright maybe sappy... what can I say I'm a hopeless romantic...
We passed him on the stairs... although... he said I was his friend... Alright I am missing a lot of words but it's Kurt Cobain for fucks sake... So quit your snickering... Made my way back home... years and years... A long time ago... Alright you caught me... I miss a few for dramatic effect.. I must keep you on your toes after all... wow that actuallly was a pretty long solo... no I'm not keep this color very long... I must keep you on your toes though...
Besides this one may be worse... I walk a lonely road... I don't know where it goes... But I know I walk alone... Ok I'm torturing myself now... My shadow is the only one that walks besides me... Sometimes I wish someone will find me... Till then I walk alone... Walking down the line... Divides me somewhere in mind... What's fucked up and everything is alright... My shadow is the only thing that walks besides me... That's kinda depressing... I wouldn't want to walk alone... Not much fun fucking with my shadow... Much more fun fucking with another person... Not that type of fucking you pervert... By the way you are not allowed to be a bigger pervert then me... What's that about catching up... You may have that backwards...
Love this song... yeah ooh... hey little ladies there's a cool young dude... girl with a jacked up dress... yeah i know I'm weird... but I always liked this song... from Saturday morning videos... I was like 13... Is it you I'm thinking of... You got the itch... And I got it too... You make it alright... I can't control myself... I know what you've been waiting for... What's my heart waiting for... Is it you I'm thinking of... It's another sappy song I know... Almost forget to change... Fall into love... I can't stop falling into love... what's my heart dreaming of... who's that falling in love... you that I've been thinking of... keep falling into love...
Stay just a bit longer... Motor don't... take a little time and leave it all behind... Stay just a bit longer... Say that you will... jackson browne is pretty cool... stay just a little bit longer... brother's don't mind... oh that that's mother... I'm a dope... shut up Blondie... piano solo... very cool... oh it's over what a waste of font easy on the eyes... oh well tough for you...
I got another confession to make... Well be abuse... the best of you...the best of you... Are you gone and on to someone new... something that I didn't have... Too Strong to lose... At least it's only one depressing love song so far... the best of you... I know I'm obessed with happy love songs... I know but not spell check... Faith it's really the pain you feel... a broken heart isn't that bad... he makes it sound so painful... but falling in love is so much fun... it's worth the chance of getting pain... there's nothing like that first kiss... The best the best of you...
Last one I'll continue next time with whichever color I left with... I better make this a good song... This one rocks... I would climb any mountain... sail across a stormy sea... the woman in you brings out the man in me... Feels the first time... The very first time... Spend time so foolishly... What's with people obssessing with the first time... It's really not that big deal... like the song says... with the right person it should always feel that way... Feels like the first time... Feels like the first time... Open up the door... Feels like the first time... They repeat that a lot don't they... Feels like the first time...
Cloud Burst
It's funny sometimes how if you are along the ocean you can always tell what's gonna happen with the weather. Like now for example the waves are starting to kick up, and at the whitecaps at the top have become really big. And the ocean has become this really dark blue. Now that the sun has pulled behind the clouds the waves have lost their crystalike shine. Speaking of the clouds whereas earlier today they were light and fluffy almost like tire tracks, now they have thickened and have thickened the sky. The clouds run practically down the horizon. And the only way that you would know that there is any sun in the sky is because of the pinkish glow doting the horizon. It's funny how one small change in the weather can suddenly make feel like a totally different day. I guess it's just one part of mother nature's ironic behaviors.
Skidmarks in the Sky
Lately I've been spending more time watching the cloud formations in the sky. Today when I went out to lunch I noticed that there were clouds, that looked like tire marks in the sky. It actually was pretty funky. To be honest I'm not sure why, maybe it's because it made me think about hitting the open road. I've always wanted to do that, just hit the open road. No destination in mind just a couple of bags packed, a full tank of gas and no destination in mind. To me there's something about that to me that screams ultimate freedom. I guess as long as you aren't running from the law, then that would be quite the opposite. And no I didn't get the idea from Thema and Louise. Weren't they running from the law or something like that?
Maybe you are right, maybe I am a throwback from another generation. You aren't the first one to tease me about being a hippie. Though I personnally think it's the hair more than anything else. I would make a horrible hippie, and no I'm not into free love. You really are starting to get the wrong idea about me. And I don't believe in the whole commune thing. I'm way too much of a capitalist, I love shoes too much. Ok this time you are right, lingerie too. And besides I don't do drugs, never have. Alright, I smoked once, alright twice but I didn't inhale I swear. Come to think of it that would be weird, could you imagine a capitalist hippie. Adam Smith would be rolling over in his grave. That was the dude that wrote Wealth of Nations right? Ahhh something else to look up on wikipedia.
Though come to think of it, I can kinda understand why in high school they used to tease me about being a hippie. After all I did have the really frizzy hair, they used to ask me if it was an afro. And I guess some of my clothes were a little out there. I remember wearing a lot ripped jeans, flowers, and brightly colored stuff. And ooh a lot flowers, I guess the only thing modern about the clothes I wore in high school was my flannel shirt. Too bad there's no ty-dyed font. Maybe I can do rainbow instead.
Maybe you are right, maybe I am a throwback from another generation. You aren't the first one to tease me about being a hippie. Though I personnally think it's the hair more than anything else. I would make a horrible hippie, and no I'm not into free love. You really are starting to get the wrong idea about me. And I don't believe in the whole commune thing. I'm way too much of a capitalist, I love shoes too much. Ok this time you are right, lingerie too. And besides I don't do drugs, never have. Alright, I smoked once, alright twice but I didn't inhale I swear. Come to think of it that would be weird, could you imagine a capitalist hippie. Adam Smith would be rolling over in his grave. That was the dude that wrote Wealth of Nations right? Ahhh something else to look up on wikipedia.
Though come to think of it, I can kinda understand why in high school they used to tease me about being a hippie. After all I did have the really frizzy hair, they used to ask me if it was an afro. And I guess some of my clothes were a little out there. I remember wearing a lot ripped jeans, flowers, and brightly colored stuff. And ooh a lot flowers, I guess the only thing modern about the clothes I wore in high school was my flannel shirt. Too bad there's no ty-dyed font. Maybe I can do rainbow instead.
Waterlogged
It's totally beautiful outside, there's nothing like quite like a beautiful spring day. Outside in the water were two swans, they are so graceful when they are swimming in the ocean. But when theycome ashore at times it's a totally different story. There's something unexplainably strange about the way they waddle when walking in the sand. I'm not quite sure if it's that their skinny little legs can't quite handle the rest of their weight or if they just don't like that wet feeling from coming out of the ocean. Honestly, I can't say that I don't understand them, there's something about when you come out from the ocean that makes you walk funny. Perhaps it's from being so immersed in the water and then suddenly not being in it anymore. What I found the funniest though was when the swan was trying to shake off all the water. There was something about the way the swan shook all it's backside feathers up that just made me break into a big smile. Maybe it could be because there's something about it that reminds me of Donald Duck.
Imagine...
Sometimes finding topics to blog about can be a little frustrating... Right now is one of those moments... I know I could not blog unless I have a topic at hand... But I like getting my random thoughts down on paper... Actually it's not really on paper... And it's just too weird to say on screen... I guess I could just say get my thoughts down... When you think about it, it's pretty cool how random your mind is... I've always heard that, but never fully realized that before... until I started writing these blogs and on a lot of them I don't think about what I'm gonna write beforehand... And it's pretty interesting how your mind flows from one thought to another... Most of the times you don't even think about it... At least I never really did before... Can you imagine if we tried harder to control our thoughts... No not others trying to control our thoughts... That's way too 1984... I meant ourselves... Imagine if we tried to control our thoughts... If you really think about it... Our thoughts are habits... Some of them are good habits... Like positive reinforcements, yadda, yadda, yadda... And then there are those negative thoughts like when we think there's something that we can't do... Can you imagine if everyone was able to remove just one or two of those thoughts a day... Could you imagine what people in this world could accomplish... There could be a cure for cancer or aids, a better way to solve the greenhouse effect, or a new source a fuel... Just imagine the unlimited possibilities...
April 24, 2007
Just A Little Confused
From to time I guess I can get a little befuddled to say the least. Last week in one of my blogs I was droning on about how sometimes I don't like people sometimes after they either switch bands or whatever they do in their solo careers. I was discussing how I wasn't that big a fan of Robert Plant (Led Zeppelin) and Pete Townsend (the who) in their solo careers. At the time I also mentioned Peter Frampton, I remembered him in some band, but I couldn't remember which one. I knew he wasn't in the who or Led Zeppelin, though to be honest sometimes I do forget who's from what band. I have more than enough trouble remembering bands and the appropriate songs and titles. Ok, you're right sometimes I can't even remember the lyrics correctly. I think you've been spending a little too much time reading my song game blogs, I don't even read those. Anyway when I try to correctly remember all that and remember the names of the members of the bands my brain sometimes just freezes. So it's really no surprise that I didn't remember which band Peter Frampton was from. After checking him out on wikipedia I find out then he wasn't even in a band. So since I link his solo stuff stinks, means I think he pretty much stinks. Alright I'm really just talking about his music. Boy was I really mixed up there. But this also the chick that likes Guns and Roses and Stone Temple Pilots, but thinks that Velvet Revolver blows ass.
Jeepers Creepers
If there every was a perfect Spring day, today would be the day. The sky was the nicest shade of blue that I've ever seen, there was barely a cloud in sky. The couple of clouds that you could see were catpiller clouds, or you know the clouds sometimes just blend into the sky. Outside the clouds were kinda like that today. And the sea was the perfect shade of crystal blue as far as the eyes could see. It was the perfect first day to spend at the beach and just sit in a chair all day. I'm surprised that the swans weren't spending the afternoon chilling on the beach, after all it was the perfect day for it. To me there's nothing quite like that first lazy hazy really warm Spring day. And besides the trees budding, flowers blooming and the grass sprouting, which is usually the first way people notice Spring has come, I spotted the first butterfly today. To me butterflies are very beautiful creatures, unfortanetly they don't live very long. I think they only live for like a season. Actually that would be a good thing to look up on wikipedia.
I didn't realize that butterflies were in the insect family, although now that I think about it that makes total sense. This is a funny fact, they were orginally called butterflies because they were believed to steal milk. How funny is that? It seems that I was pretty close to accurate with my one year guess. To be honest the article is very long, and I like butterflies but not enough to read this article. If you would like to by only means go ahead.
I didn't realize that butterflies were in the insect family, although now that I think about it that makes total sense. This is a funny fact, they were orginally called butterflies because they were believed to steal milk. How funny is that? It seems that I was pretty close to accurate with my one year guess. To be honest the article is very long, and I like butterflies but not enough to read this article. If you would like to by only means go ahead.
Down Under... Oops Wrong Spot
Disclaimer: So I decided to go back to my playing on Wikipedia. I decided to take a break from art and music. For a change I decided to look up New Zealand because ever since seeing the Lord of the Rings I've wanted to go there. After seeing that scenery how could you not.
Like most countries, it was named after another area. Dutch cartograhers decided to name it after the province of Zeeland. I guess that must be an area in the Netherlands. Actually the history sounds pretty interesting, I never remember learing anything about the history of New Zealand in social studies. It appears the area was first settled by Polynesians. Sounds like over time they spread out and diversified, happens most of the time. No surprise, that the Dutch were the first Europeans in the area, after hearing that the they were the ones to name the country. Wow they first went there in 1642, but it appears that they didn't stay there very long. Eventually the English established themselves there with James Cook leading the first English explorers in the area. That's interesting the country really wasn't fully established until 1840, took awhile after the first settlers came. Hey this is really cool, New Zealand was the first country to give women to vote in 1893. They became a fully independent country in 1947, I guess that's a little surprising, that's actually after World War II. This is pretty cool eighty percent of New Zealand's plant life only occurs in New Zealand. Hmmm this article didn't really go into too much of the touristy stuff. Oh well.
Like most countries, it was named after another area. Dutch cartograhers decided to name it after the province of Zeeland. I guess that must be an area in the Netherlands. Actually the history sounds pretty interesting, I never remember learing anything about the history of New Zealand in social studies. It appears the area was first settled by Polynesians. Sounds like over time they spread out and diversified, happens most of the time. No surprise, that the Dutch were the first Europeans in the area, after hearing that the they were the ones to name the country. Wow they first went there in 1642, but it appears that they didn't stay there very long. Eventually the English established themselves there with James Cook leading the first English explorers in the area. That's interesting the country really wasn't fully established until 1840, took awhile after the first settlers came. Hey this is really cool, New Zealand was the first country to give women to vote in 1893. They became a fully independent country in 1947, I guess that's a little surprising, that's actually after World War II. This is pretty cool eighty percent of New Zealand's plant life only occurs in New Zealand. Hmmm this article didn't really go into too much of the touristy stuff. Oh well.
Battleship
My blog yesterday on two ships, well it's gotten me to do some thinking. I know you are gonna make some crack about how it's not usually good when I start thinking. Actually I really can't pick on you about that one, because I often say the same thing myself.
Anyway like I was saying that blog got me to thinking. In that position could those two people be both stubborn and a pussy at the same time. At first I thought not really, because how is that really possible. Granted it's kinda silly to be both of those things at once. But less face it stranger things have happened. And after doing some soul searching I realized that there were times in my life where I was both of those things. If you think about those two ships they are pussies because they won't face each other. Why are they stubborn, often after awhile those ships are holding the guns so tightly and for so long that they just forget why they are holding them for. After awhile these ships are just at a stalemate for the sake of it.
I know you are gonna ask, what about those convictions. Why do I know that, well I did the same thing. Those two ships if they never discussed their convictions, how do they know they are different. Just imagine if things were discussed before the Lusitiana was sunk before World War I. Because at the end of the day our involvement in that war was because of a trade dispute with Germany. Imagine if things were discussed first how many lives and money would have been saved. All that because two countries were too stubborn to discuss things out. And then there's the other way, what if these ships have these really strong convictions but isn't willing to even throw out a single cannon for them. And let's face it if you combine these two characteristics, you have well a cold war. Look how long that thing lasted. I guess the big thing is for one of the ships to make a move, but when the two ships are in stalemate that's a lot easier said than done.
Anyway like I was saying that blog got me to thinking. In that position could those two people be both stubborn and a pussy at the same time. At first I thought not really, because how is that really possible. Granted it's kinda silly to be both of those things at once. But less face it stranger things have happened. And after doing some soul searching I realized that there were times in my life where I was both of those things. If you think about those two ships they are pussies because they won't face each other. Why are they stubborn, often after awhile those ships are holding the guns so tightly and for so long that they just forget why they are holding them for. After awhile these ships are just at a stalemate for the sake of it.
I know you are gonna ask, what about those convictions. Why do I know that, well I did the same thing. Those two ships if they never discussed their convictions, how do they know they are different. Just imagine if things were discussed before the Lusitiana was sunk before World War I. Because at the end of the day our involvement in that war was because of a trade dispute with Germany. Imagine if things were discussed first how many lives and money would have been saved. All that because two countries were too stubborn to discuss things out. And then there's the other way, what if these ships have these really strong convictions but isn't willing to even throw out a single cannon for them. And let's face it if you combine these two characteristics, you have well a cold war. Look how long that thing lasted. I guess the big thing is for one of the ships to make a move, but when the two ships are in stalemate that's a lot easier said than done.
Chocolate Fudge Ripple
Disclaimer: No this blog is not about ice cream. I know it's just been awhile since I had such a silly title. But I decided this blog needed a silly title for comic relief. And yes I did write the blog first before the title and disclaimer.
Everyone has at least one or two moments in their lives where they look back and wonder what if I did that different. I know there's no point, and it's not gonna do any good. After all regrets aren't gonna do anyone any good. But let's be honest it can be hard sometimes. Everyone has one or two events in their lives where the actions that they took changed their lives forever. And sometimes you look back and you can't help but wonder what would have happened if you took the exact opposite action. At the end of the day, it's hard to not sit back and wonder how your life would be different.
Sometimes it's something we did yesterday, last week, last month, a year ago or even years ago. And I know there's no point for kicking myself for decisions I made in my past. After all they made me who I am today, and besides without a time machine there's just no point. But when you see how much one single event, and sometimes even a one second split decision changes your life forever. Let's face it, one decison one way or another will change the path of your life. Because it sends this ripple effect on your life. The ripple starts really small and insignificant, but over time it becomes larger and larger. I guess at the end of the day the only thing you can do is if you don't like the ripple, is to take actions to create a new ripple. And not worry about the ripples you've already created. Because there's really not you can do to change the past. The ironic thing is that it's easier to create new ripples, then it is to forget about the old ripples. At least in my case. The only problem is that sometimes looking back at those old ripples stops you from making new ones. And if I would stop looking at those darn past ripples that would cause one hell of an awesome ripple. I guess the only way to do that is to just stop.
Everyone has at least one or two moments in their lives where they look back and wonder what if I did that different. I know there's no point, and it's not gonna do any good. After all regrets aren't gonna do anyone any good. But let's be honest it can be hard sometimes. Everyone has one or two events in their lives where the actions that they took changed their lives forever. And sometimes you look back and you can't help but wonder what would have happened if you took the exact opposite action. At the end of the day, it's hard to not sit back and wonder how your life would be different.
Sometimes it's something we did yesterday, last week, last month, a year ago or even years ago. And I know there's no point for kicking myself for decisions I made in my past. After all they made me who I am today, and besides without a time machine there's just no point. But when you see how much one single event, and sometimes even a one second split decision changes your life forever. Let's face it, one decison one way or another will change the path of your life. Because it sends this ripple effect on your life. The ripple starts really small and insignificant, but over time it becomes larger and larger. I guess at the end of the day the only thing you can do is if you don't like the ripple, is to take actions to create a new ripple. And not worry about the ripples you've already created. Because there's really not you can do to change the past. The ironic thing is that it's easier to create new ripples, then it is to forget about the old ripples. At least in my case. The only problem is that sometimes looking back at those old ripples stops you from making new ones. And if I would stop looking at those darn past ripples that would cause one hell of an awesome ripple. I guess the only way to do that is to just stop.
April 23, 2007
Two Ships
Have you ever had someone either a loved one, a friend, family member, yadda yadda yadda who you felt you just don't see eye to eye with. That the two of you are just like two ships during the night. I've always heard the expression, but until recently I never really trully understood the meaning of it. Of there being someone that you pass right by see right in the eye, but you just pass right by each other. I never really understood how too people could be like that. Deep down I always felt that it was laziness, a refusal to see the other person's viewpoint, or just plain stubborness.
Actually maybe stubborness may have something to do with it. But I'm starting to see that maybe there's nothing wrong with that. There is a point in your life where maybe you know what you want, and you have the right to that. Maybe to some people, those two ships are like two bulls that are in a fight. You know waiting for the other to surrender. However, it's not necessarily that way after all each person should have their own convinctions. I know I have mine, and I can respect that someone else has them. I can respect that somebody stands by them, but that same person better respect that I'm gonna stand by mine. In fact I think two ships sailing in the night are the opposite of being stubborn, I guess that would be more like a couple of pussies. My mind is drawing drawing a blank as to what type of animal that would be, oh well. But at the end of the day I'm just at the point in my life where if I'm not gonna get someone that either wants what I want or willing to compromise I rather just walk away. And I don't that is either being a pussy or stubborn. Those are just my convinctions, and I'm gonna stick to them.
Actually maybe stubborness may have something to do with it. But I'm starting to see that maybe there's nothing wrong with that. There is a point in your life where maybe you know what you want, and you have the right to that. Maybe to some people, those two ships are like two bulls that are in a fight. You know waiting for the other to surrender. However, it's not necessarily that way after all each person should have their own convinctions. I know I have mine, and I can respect that someone else has them. I can respect that somebody stands by them, but that same person better respect that I'm gonna stand by mine. In fact I think two ships sailing in the night are the opposite of being stubborn, I guess that would be more like a couple of pussies. My mind is drawing drawing a blank as to what type of animal that would be, oh well. But at the end of the day I'm just at the point in my life where if I'm not gonna get someone that either wants what I want or willing to compromise I rather just walk away. And I don't that is either being a pussy or stubborn. Those are just my convinctions, and I'm gonna stick to them.
No Title...I'm Being Lazy
Sometimes the hardest part of writing these blogs is deciding where to start. Let's face it, I've written some blogs that were pretty far off the wall. Take my last blog, I started by writing about fucking dots. And I know that some people that read my blog must think I'm nuts. Because when I read this blog I think that sometimes too. And no I'm not hearing voices in my head, I would wonder that to if I was you. I'm just being a sacarastic twit to my readers. Yes, that may be a little mean, but let's face it I don't get paid anything from you reading this dribble. And yes I am too lazy to use the spell check. Does that really surprise you? This is the chick that puts dots sometimes in her blogs so that they can look symetric. How is that lazy, you ask? Because I could actually re-read the blog and add a few words here or there to even it out. Yup I've been too lazy with the disclaimers, too. Actually sometimes I do write them to start, and add some at the end. Sometimes I add during the middle too. Maybe I should end this blog while I'm ahead. Let's face it, it's not really going anywhere and I should abandon ship.
Pattern for a Purpose or Maybe Not
I know it's been awhile since I've used dots in my blogs... And I figured now was as good a time as any... You may find it annoying, but I like them... They give my blog symetry... Speaking of symetry the ducks along the water now they are always lined up in a symetric format... Actually they may actually be geese I'm not totally sure... After all it's not like I'm a bird expert or anything like that... Not only are they in a symetric line when they fly or when they swim... But also when they are along the beach... You think they would stand how ever they want... After all the gulls when they are on the sand they don't seem to be in a symetric format... When they are swimming in the ocean they are... Maybe they are in a pattern and I just don't see it... Sometimes a pattern is hard to see unless someone else points out to you... I've heard people say that everything in life has a pattern to it... But I haven't decided whether or not I agree yet... I'm just not sure if life is just that much like a quilt... However I guess there is somewhat of a point to this... Come to think of my blogs have somewhat of a pattern to them... Almost everday, at least when I'm at work I write blogs about the view around the same times... And at the very least my other blogs do have the pattern of what times I write them up... Yes you are right the whole point of the dots in this blog was so that things could be symetric so there is a pattern there too... I wonder what else in my life has a pattern...
A Photograhic Moment
Today is one of those moments that seems that can be best captured on film. You know one of those moments you say is best remembered with a picture. It's is one of those totally gorgeous days where you wish could just grab a chair and lounge around all day. Actually today is the perfect day to take a nap in a hammock. It's funny for some reason I think of a hammock, I think of Garfield. I have no reason why, because I never remember seeing Garfield in one. Maybe it's because it's the perfect place for a nap and when I think of napping Garfield comes to mind. See I'm not always illogical, I know you think I am. But you must admit that your logic isn't exactly perfect either. I'm sure you've done some things that didn't exactly make sense. Actually I know you have.
There you go distracting me again, you always do that. It's starting to get a little frustrating. Anyway back to the original subject at hand. Today is absolutely beautiful the water was shiny and glistening. I was actually surprised there really weren't any boats out. Maybe it was because it was still early or because they were probably out a lot this past weekend. My friends the swans were back and sunning themselves on the beach. It really was a beautiful morning on the beach. I couldn't imagine that there could be too many things that would make it a more beautiful day.
There you go distracting me again, you always do that. It's starting to get a little frustrating. Anyway back to the original subject at hand. Today is absolutely beautiful the water was shiny and glistening. I was actually surprised there really weren't any boats out. Maybe it was because it was still early or because they were probably out a lot this past weekend. My friends the swans were back and sunning themselves on the beach. It really was a beautiful morning on the beach. I couldn't imagine that there could be too many things that would make it a more beautiful day.
The Power of the Mind
I think we all have moments where we question what we are doing with our lives. No, I'm not thinking about taking my life. There's a bigger picture out there. Something greater, bigger than doing 9 to 5 until 65. It sometimes feels like ordinary life is like being a member of the drone army. You know, just going through the motions of life until until you collapse and fall apart because you parts don't work anymore. Some people may argue that I'm being depressing but isn't that how the average person lives. And I guess I just feel that we were all put on the planet for something bigger and better than that. After we were given the ability of free will, to think and live for ourselves.
But at the end of the day most of us just don't use it. Instead we live like sheep just following the sheepdog at the front of the line. I always wondered about that, why do the sheep follow the dogs. They just follow them without giving it a second thought. People are like that a lot of times too. Many people just follow whoever is in front of them with blind faith, and don't even question if they are taking the right actions for themselves. Maybe at the end of the day I just feel that I'm better than that. It's definetly something I need to work on more, to use my free will.
But at the end of the day most of us just don't use it. Instead we live like sheep just following the sheepdog at the front of the line. I always wondered about that, why do the sheep follow the dogs. They just follow them without giving it a second thought. People are like that a lot of times too. Many people just follow whoever is in front of them with blind faith, and don't even question if they are taking the right actions for themselves. Maybe at the end of the day I just feel that I'm better than that. It's definetly something I need to work on more, to use my free will.
No Pain No Gain
They say that anything worthwhile is not easy. And I must say that there's part of me that wonders whether or not they are on crack. Because to be honest I don't understand this logic. Why does something have to be painful to be good? Sometimes I question if there are people that make things difficult for the sake of being difficult. How do I know this? Well, because I've done it myself. And besides there are times where things are difficult and the end results still aren't worth it. I've been there in the past, maybe not anytime recently but I have. You know where you put in more than what you got out. I've done it especially in relationships. And finding out that you haven't gotten what you put in is a tough pill to swallow. It's kinda like one of those really big gel tab pills you take if you have a really bad cold. You know that really big lump you feel in your throat. Where it feels like it got caught there, and you think you are about to choke. It feels kinda like that.
All I Want is You
I've always loved this song. There's something about U2's ballads, that make me think. What I love about this song is that it's about love, but it's not one of those sappy love songs. And at the same time it still has hope in it. Maybe it reflects somewhat how I feel about love right now. Let's face it how could I look at love like it's all roses, but at the same time I don't want to be pretty bitter. I know I could try to look at love with with rose colored glasses, but maybe I don't want to. For some reason it makes me appreciate it more.
Maybe you're right and my attitude towards love makes it more complicated. But let's face facts love is a complicated thing. And maybe you're right maybe I'm attracting that, but maybe there's a reason. Besides have you ever thought that you don't exactly make it simple yourself? Alright, maybe it's complicated for each person for different reasons. I guess for me maybe I love complicated because it makes me feel so claustrophobic. I would say suffocating but that seems so extreme. Perhaps, you are right maybe claustrophobic is extreme too. But I'm not really sure how else to describe it. There is the possibility that I just don't know how to express it in words.
And no it's not the commitment part, for the right person I would have no problem with that. There are a lot of great things that come with commitment. And no attachment doesn't bother me either, I know with the right person that wouldn't be a problem either. Maybe I'm just petrified of meeting the right person and blowing a good thing because I'm not ready to be as emotionally committed. Let's face it's not fun being with someone that's not as emotionally committed as you. I know, because well I've been there. Maybe I just am afraid that I'll meet the right person, and they will end up resenting me in the end because I'm not as emotionally committed as they are. After all I did, and I know how much that stings. How can I go in a relationship, knowing them I'm causing them that pain? Perhaps you are right and I'm being silly. But what if you aren't?
Maybe you're right and my attitude towards love makes it more complicated. But let's face facts love is a complicated thing. And maybe you're right maybe I'm attracting that, but maybe there's a reason. Besides have you ever thought that you don't exactly make it simple yourself? Alright, maybe it's complicated for each person for different reasons. I guess for me maybe I love complicated because it makes me feel so claustrophobic. I would say suffocating but that seems so extreme. Perhaps, you are right maybe claustrophobic is extreme too. But I'm not really sure how else to describe it. There is the possibility that I just don't know how to express it in words.
And no it's not the commitment part, for the right person I would have no problem with that. There are a lot of great things that come with commitment. And no attachment doesn't bother me either, I know with the right person that wouldn't be a problem either. Maybe I'm just petrified of meeting the right person and blowing a good thing because I'm not ready to be as emotionally committed. Let's face it's not fun being with someone that's not as emotionally committed as you. I know, because well I've been there. Maybe I just am afraid that I'll meet the right person, and they will end up resenting me in the end because I'm not as emotionally committed as they are. After all I did, and I know how much that stings. How can I go in a relationship, knowing them I'm causing them that pain? Perhaps you are right and I'm being silly. But what if you aren't?
These are the Days
The last couple of days have been gorgeous outside. Hence the reason I've been writing a lot less blogs. Instead of sitting inside in front of a computer, I've gone outside to enjoy the sunshine. For awhile I thought I was gonna forget what sunshine was like. But I must admit that it was worth it for the weather that we've had the last couple of days. There's nothing quite like Spring days like these. Everything is starting to blossom, the leaves on the trees are coming back, flowers are blooming, and new blades of grass are sprouting. To me there's nothing quite like watching new life sprout to life. I know to some people I may seem silly but let's face it's days like these that we wait all Winter for. And I can't wait for more of them.
April 22, 2007
It was the best of the times, it was the worst of times. I always thought that was a good way to start a book. Though I don't remember reading much more of it. In fact I don't think I read past the first page. If I did I don't remember it, I'm sorry but that shit was so fucking thick. And let's face it, Dickens is never an easy read. Granted it was a long time ago, but still his stories are so long and wordy. For the life of me I can't remember which one of his books I had to read in school.
Now that would be a tough question to answer, which was the hardest book to read in school. There are a couple that come to mind, but I would have go with Crime and Punishment. That book was sheer torture, I swear each time I picked up that book and started reading it I fell asleep. I can't quite explain why, it had a decent plot. Granted it was a very long book, but I've also read other very long books and I don't remember hating them so much. For example, Grapes of Wrath was much longer and I don't remember it being as painful. But all that symbolism my teacher made us analyze was a real pain in the ass. Of course, the same thing is true about the Scarlet Letter and that book was far from long. But those darn lit logs that bitchy teacher made us write were horrible. In the end it shows that the length of the book isn't always what makes it painful to read. Just think about the Canterbury Tales, the old English in that was horrible to read. I never thought I would wish I was reading Shakespeare instead. Although I did like Hamlet and Macbeth. Richard the III and Othello were torture on speed. And yes I was really bad at Greek mythologies too, but blogging about them is just too much even for me.
Now that would be a tough question to answer, which was the hardest book to read in school. There are a couple that come to mind, but I would have go with Crime and Punishment. That book was sheer torture, I swear each time I picked up that book and started reading it I fell asleep. I can't quite explain why, it had a decent plot. Granted it was a very long book, but I've also read other very long books and I don't remember hating them so much. For example, Grapes of Wrath was much longer and I don't remember it being as painful. But all that symbolism my teacher made us analyze was a real pain in the ass. Of course, the same thing is true about the Scarlet Letter and that book was far from long. But those darn lit logs that bitchy teacher made us write were horrible. In the end it shows that the length of the book isn't always what makes it painful to read. Just think about the Canterbury Tales, the old English in that was horrible to read. I never thought I would wish I was reading Shakespeare instead. Although I did like Hamlet and Macbeth. Richard the III and Othello were torture on speed. And yes I was really bad at Greek mythologies too, but blogging about them is just too much even for me.
April 21, 2007
Rock Me
Alright I was playing with my new internet website fixation. I forget what the first topic that I was on that linked to it, but I was checking out the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's listing of 500 songs that shaped rock music. No surprise that the Beatles were on the top of list with seven songs, with an additional four if you count solo songs from Paul and John. Following them next in the list with no surprise were Elvis, the Stones, Dylan, and the Beach Boys. One thing that did surprise me though was that Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson beat out the Who for more songs on the list. There are probably others too, but the Who was the first one to cross my mind.
Hmmm I'm starting to have some issues with this list. How does some Michael Jackson song I never heard of get on this list, but not Roadhouse Blues by the Doors. Maybe I should check which Who songs made the list. Alright, the Who have three songs on the list which isn't too bad. But I guess what I find a little surprising is that Join Together, You Better Bet, or Pinball Wizard weren't on the list. Maybe they didn't want to just pick ones from their albums that were meant to be heard all together, or the other songs were just more influential to music. After all I may be thinking in terms of which songs I like and not what was more influential. Since I'm just a listener and not a musician I may have a difference of opinion.
Let's check out Led Zeppelin, alright if I had to pick four of their songs those are the ones I would have picked, so that's cool. Alright, Houston we have a problem. How the hell did MC Hammer manage to get on this list. I'm sorry I just don't understand how he influenced rock and roll. Maybe by showing them what not to do? And then Steve Miller only has Fly Like an Eagle and not the Joker. How many other musicians have re-done that song? At least I think it was his, even if not that's the first version that comes to my mind. Wow, Dylan's version of knocking on heaven's door is not on the list either. Let's check out Clapton, only after midnight. Well the thing with Clapton a lot of his influence is scattered because he was in a lot of bands. So that's at least understandable. Three songs for Springsteen, but it doesn't include Born in the USA which is a little bit of a surprise. But at least Dancing in the Dark and Born to Run were included.
I'm almost afraid to look at AC/DC and Aerosmith but I saved them for last, so what the hell. AC/DC isn't too bad there's Highway to Hell and Back to Black. It would have been cool if Shook Me all Night was there, but to be honest I wasn't expecting it to. What's with Toys in the Attic for Aerosmith. I guess I should be glad they picked up Dream On. I know I'm too sarcastic for my own good sometimes.
Hmmm I'm starting to have some issues with this list. How does some Michael Jackson song I never heard of get on this list, but not Roadhouse Blues by the Doors. Maybe I should check which Who songs made the list. Alright, the Who have three songs on the list which isn't too bad. But I guess what I find a little surprising is that Join Together, You Better Bet, or Pinball Wizard weren't on the list. Maybe they didn't want to just pick ones from their albums that were meant to be heard all together, or the other songs were just more influential to music. After all I may be thinking in terms of which songs I like and not what was more influential. Since I'm just a listener and not a musician I may have a difference of opinion.
Let's check out Led Zeppelin, alright if I had to pick four of their songs those are the ones I would have picked, so that's cool. Alright, Houston we have a problem. How the hell did MC Hammer manage to get on this list. I'm sorry I just don't understand how he influenced rock and roll. Maybe by showing them what not to do? And then Steve Miller only has Fly Like an Eagle and not the Joker. How many other musicians have re-done that song? At least I think it was his, even if not that's the first version that comes to my mind. Wow, Dylan's version of knocking on heaven's door is not on the list either. Let's check out Clapton, only after midnight. Well the thing with Clapton a lot of his influence is scattered because he was in a lot of bands. So that's at least understandable. Three songs for Springsteen, but it doesn't include Born in the USA which is a little bit of a surprise. But at least Dancing in the Dark and Born to Run were included.
I'm almost afraid to look at AC/DC and Aerosmith but I saved them for last, so what the hell. AC/DC isn't too bad there's Highway to Hell and Back to Black. It would have been cool if Shook Me all Night was there, but to be honest I wasn't expecting it to. What's with Toys in the Attic for Aerosmith. I guess I should be glad they picked up Dream On. I know I'm too sarcastic for my own good sometimes.
Round and Round in Circles
Have you ever been in a point in your life where you feel like you've come full circle? Alright maybe not full circle, but kinda feel like you are in a similar place that you've been in before. And you are more confused than you when you were there the first time. Yes, more confusing than this blog. I know this is pretty confusing, I just read the last couple of sentences and I'm even like what the fuck. It's probably because I'm not really sure what's going on in my head right now. And your little sarcastic comments about how I never what's going on in my head are not appreciated. And besides you really shouldn't talk, Blondie.
Where was I before you distracted me? Oh yeah, that whole circle concept. I guess my point is the more things change the more they stay the same. As a sit here I'm trying to write what I mean by that, and for some reason I just can't explain what I mean. Maybe at the end of the day I'm just not sure what I'm talking about it. But at the same time, if you feel a certain way does it really need to be explained. Maybe that's part of my problem. I'm always trying to find an explanation for everything. And nothing everything in life has one. I know, I know sometimes I just make things too complicated. But I think everyone does that from time to time, huh?
Where was I before you distracted me? Oh yeah, that whole circle concept. I guess my point is the more things change the more they stay the same. As a sit here I'm trying to write what I mean by that, and for some reason I just can't explain what I mean. Maybe at the end of the day I'm just not sure what I'm talking about it. But at the same time, if you feel a certain way does it really need to be explained. Maybe that's part of my problem. I'm always trying to find an explanation for everything. And nothing everything in life has one. I know, I know sometimes I just make things too complicated. But I think everyone does that from time to time, huh?
What's my Point?
I'm sure a lot times you probably read my blog, and say what the fuck is this chick talking about? I know because, well I've done it myself. Maybe that's part of the point of this blog. After all I created this blog just to jot down my random thoughts. And let's face a lot of my thoughts can be pretty random at times. And I can only imagine if I find my blogs confusing at times, I can only imagine how confused others would be. Where is this coming from, maybe I'm not really sure. After all I just said how sometimes I confuse myself. Maybe this is just one of those moments where I'm really confused. You may say that I'm confused a lot more often than that, but you really shouldn't talk. I know you aren't the only one that's a pain the ass. But your comebacks are a lot quicker than mine. Alright, maybe I'll give you that one, not necessarily always. Maybe this blog really didn't have a point, and I should quit while I'm ahead.
April 20, 2007
A Picture is Worth More Than a Thousand Words
So I decided to play on Wikipedia again, I know I've developed a new obsession. And I know obsessions aren't healthy. But I guess I can't help myself. So I decided for now to switch from music to art. I've always liked impressionism so I decided to see what the site had to say about it. They say that you learn something new everyday, I didn't know that the term was coined from a Claude Monet Painting. Wow, I didn't realize that it also had a effect on music and literature. Actually after I think about that makes a lot of sense. I can't believe that beforehand landscape paintings were only painted indoors, that seems a little bizarre to say the least. They really did struggle to get their artwork out there, it shows what happens when you are passionate about what you do. But if you think about it really is amazing how they given the name as a put down in a newspaper by a critic, and then went on to inspire tons of artists to paint. And their works are now in museums all over the world, and revered by millions of people. Just imagine modern art without impressionism, and without the influence of artists like Monet, Manet, Degas, Renoir, and Cezanne.
Of course one of the first big movements that it effected was post-impressionism. It's kinda funny the article says that while they were influenced by impressionism they also rejected their limitations. With George Seurat they had that big pointillism movement, which to be honest I always found rather boring. Now Van Gogh as always been one of my favorite artists, even if he was a little crazy. Why would he think that his girlfriend would want his ear. I remember when I first saw Starry Night when I had to go to the Museum of Modern Art for a paper in high school. It was the first painting that I looked at just went wow. Fauvism and Cubism were both influenced by Pablo Picasso, which is another one of my favorite artists after Van Gogh and Monet.
Of course one of the first big movements that it effected was post-impressionism. It's kinda funny the article says that while they were influenced by impressionism they also rejected their limitations. With George Seurat they had that big pointillism movement, which to be honest I always found rather boring. Now Van Gogh as always been one of my favorite artists, even if he was a little crazy. Why would he think that his girlfriend would want his ear. I remember when I first saw Starry Night when I had to go to the Museum of Modern Art for a paper in high school. It was the first painting that I looked at just went wow. Fauvism and Cubism were both influenced by Pablo Picasso, which is another one of my favorite artists after Van Gogh and Monet.
Changes In Latittudes Changes in Attitudes
Disclaimer: Some people make fun of me when they hear that I like Jimmy Buffet, but I really don't care. His songs make me smile. And besides how many musicians nowadays sing with a positive attitude. It also doesn't hurt that his songs make me feel like I'm on the beach drinking frozen drinks. Or at least a tiki bar, now those are cool.
It's so true do notice when you go on vacation, your attitude changes. And sometimes it's not necessarily literal. Sometimes it's funny how one small little thing can have such a change on your attitude. That's definitly true about lots of things in life. I know I don't even know what I am talking about anymore. The more I ramble the more I don't know what I talking about. I guess I really am my father's daughter.
This blog is starting to jump all over the place now. I know that's not exactly something new. Back the changes attitude thing. Just imagine if everyone did one little thing every day to make themselves a little happier that day. Can you imagine how much happier this world would be. Because let's be honest when we are in a bad mood there's always someone that we take it out on. Whether it's a loved one, a friend, a co-worker, our pets, there's always someone there getting the brunt of it. Just imagine if we made one small change to work past it, how not only would it effect our lives but the lives of others. I know, it's something I have to work on, too. Everyone includes me too.
It's so true do notice when you go on vacation, your attitude changes. And sometimes it's not necessarily literal. Sometimes it's funny how one small little thing can have such a change on your attitude. That's definitly true about lots of things in life. I know I don't even know what I am talking about anymore. The more I ramble the more I don't know what I talking about. I guess I really am my father's daughter.
This blog is starting to jump all over the place now. I know that's not exactly something new. Back the changes attitude thing. Just imagine if everyone did one little thing every day to make themselves a little happier that day. Can you imagine how much happier this world would be. Because let's be honest when we are in a bad mood there's always someone that we take it out on. Whether it's a loved one, a friend, a co-worker, our pets, there's always someone there getting the brunt of it. Just imagine if we made one small change to work past it, how not only would it effect our lives but the lives of others. I know, it's something I have to work on, too. Everyone includes me too.
April 19, 2007
At Last
Alright, for the first time in like a week the sun is starting to peak it's head out. I know I'm weird but I love watching the clouds as they start to seperate. Today they looked really actually. The clouds were really thick and fluffy, but in certain spots they were pulling apart. And you can could circles of blue skies. And what was really cool was that it was low tide, and you know how you can still see where the water pulls out during high tide along the beach. Well in some spots you could see the circular formations. It formed this like color rainbow pattern, and it was pretty funky.
One other cool think I noticed was that the clouds were really puffy towards the top of the sky. As you got closer to the horizon, the clouds got thinner and thinner. Along the horizon there were nothing but small clouds, what I refer to as catpiller clouds. I guess I can see where artists get their inspiration for prospective drawing. For some reason, in high school art class I was never really able to fully figure it out. It frustrated the heck out of me. Of course, art was never exactly my thing. Don't get me wrong, I always appreciated art, but creating it was always a bit intimating to me. The old things that were more intimating were sports, I am a total klutz, and playing an instrument, I'm completely tone deaf. In elementary school I wanted to break that fucking recorder. I might have tried a few times, but have you ever tried? It's goddamn impossible to break that thing. Like art, I like music it's just reproducing it is, well anytime I tried to play every note came out so damn flat. Oh well, C'est la vie.
One other cool think I noticed was that the clouds were really puffy towards the top of the sky. As you got closer to the horizon, the clouds got thinner and thinner. Along the horizon there were nothing but small clouds, what I refer to as catpiller clouds. I guess I can see where artists get their inspiration for prospective drawing. For some reason, in high school art class I was never really able to fully figure it out. It frustrated the heck out of me. Of course, art was never exactly my thing. Don't get me wrong, I always appreciated art, but creating it was always a bit intimating to me. The old things that were more intimating were sports, I am a total klutz, and playing an instrument, I'm completely tone deaf. In elementary school I wanted to break that fucking recorder. I might have tried a few times, but have you ever tried? It's goddamn impossible to break that thing. Like art, I like music it's just reproducing it is, well anytime I tried to play every note came out so damn flat. Oh well, C'est la vie.
Ramble On
Ok I feel stupid now. As you can see I've started looking stuff up on Wikipedia. After my last post I decided to look up Led Zeppelin because I was never really sure how they got their name. So after reading the first paragraph of their page I see that they developed from the Yardbirds. I knew that there was a band that developed from the Yardbirds, actually I didn't know until I took a classic rock quiz online. But I can't remember if it didn't give the answers or if I was too lazy to look them up. I didn't realize that they orginally wanted Jeff Beck in there maybe I should listen to more of his stuff. Though I've noticed I tend to not like most musicians outside their original group. Like I really don't like Peter Frampton's and Robert Plant's solo stuff. But then again I do like Clapton but then again I found out about him before Cream and Derrick and the Dominos. It could perhaps be something psyschological.
Wow their orginal Bassist dropped out of the group, to go into photography and took the picture for their debut album. How cool is that? Ok now this is a cool way to get a name. The newspaper predicted that they would go down like a Zeppelin. That's kick ass, imagine that people think that you are gonna fall and the 20 or 30 years you are listed as the number 1 all time hard rock band.
Wow their orginal Bassist dropped out of the group, to go into photography and took the picture for their debut album. How cool is that? Ok now this is a cool way to get a name. The newspaper predicted that they would go down like a Zeppelin. That's kick ass, imagine that people think that you are gonna fall and the 20 or 30 years you are listed as the number 1 all time hard rock band.
Hoochie Coochie Man
I decided since I'm at work and I don't feel like working, let's face it I never do, to continue my wikipedia research from yesterday. Why blog about it? I haven't really come up with anything better to blog about today. If you read my blog from yesterday, you'll know that I didn't know that the Rolling Stones picked their name as a tribute to a Muddy Water song. Since I didn't know who Muddy Waters was I figured it would be cool to find out. And besides if I'm gonna get paid to do it, it's even better. I know I know there are more useful things I could do at work and get paid for. Just be quiet, I didn't ask you.
Anyway, when I heard the name I assumed it was a group, but now I find out that it's not. Actually it's an American Blues musician. I think that's pretty cool, a British Invasion band being influenced by an Early Blues musician. Talk about coming full circle. Hmmm this is pretty cool he got his nickname because he liked playing the mud as a child. I like him already. Wow ever cooler he used to run a gamling house in Mississippi. Wow I didn't know that he did both Hoochie Coochie Man and I Just Want To Make Love to You. That's pretty cool when you think about it, look how many famous Jazz musicians redid those songs, and still do to this day. Cool, he helped Chuck Berry get his start, could you imagine rock and roll without him?
Wow I can't believe how many British bands he influenced, many of which are my favorties. He not only influenced the Stones. But he also influenced Clapton, Cream and Led Zeppelin. I didn't know but I didn't know that Whole Lotta Love was influenced by his song You Shook Me. This is all pretty cool, so now I must listen to some of his stuff. Just look at how many musicians he directly or indirectly influenced. He influenced the Stones, Led Zeppelin, Clapton, and Cream. Look at the music careers they've had and how many more they influenced. Wow look at the ripple effect that one man created.
Anyway, when I heard the name I assumed it was a group, but now I find out that it's not. Actually it's an American Blues musician. I think that's pretty cool, a British Invasion band being influenced by an Early Blues musician. Talk about coming full circle. Hmmm this is pretty cool he got his nickname because he liked playing the mud as a child. I like him already. Wow ever cooler he used to run a gamling house in Mississippi. Wow I didn't know that he did both Hoochie Coochie Man and I Just Want To Make Love to You. That's pretty cool when you think about it, look how many famous Jazz musicians redid those songs, and still do to this day. Cool, he helped Chuck Berry get his start, could you imagine rock and roll without him?
Wow I can't believe how many British bands he influenced, many of which are my favorties. He not only influenced the Stones. But he also influenced Clapton, Cream and Led Zeppelin. I didn't know but I didn't know that Whole Lotta Love was influenced by his song You Shook Me. This is all pretty cool, so now I must listen to some of his stuff. Just look at how many musicians he directly or indirectly influenced. He influenced the Stones, Led Zeppelin, Clapton, and Cream. Look at the music careers they've had and how many more they influenced. Wow look at the ripple effect that one man created.
All in the Mind
Lately I think I've been trying to hard to come up with material for my blog. It just seems to me that my mind has hit brain freeze when it comes to writing. Usually I'll just pull up the blank blogger screen, and the words will just flow. But I don't what it is, but lately the words don't seem to come. Even after I go for the walk along the water, I just don't get it. But to be honest in the last week I have been watching the water a lot less intently. Maybe the fact that the swans haven't been there, have made me a little less enthusiatic. Or it could be that I'm just bored of blogging about the water. I guess right now, I just can't think about anything else to blog about.
I guess maybe there's some sorta physchological pattern in my blogs that I can't quite figure out. After all sometimes it feels like I go in circles with these things. And I know that they say the mind works in mysterious ways. Like all of sudden I'll here a song, or perhaps something will just hit out of the blue. And then I'll suddenly have something to blog about. Maybe I should stop thinking about finding stuff to blog about, and things will just flow. It's kinda weird but one day last week someone told me that they thought my blogs were preplanned, and I explained that they weren't. But ever since then I've been obsessed with trying to come up with topics before I start writing. It's strange how somehow one little comment like that makes the wheels in my mind turn. That kinda reminds me how they used to show in cartoons a hamster running in a person's head. I can't remember which character it was. Hmmm I doubt it was looney toons, it certainly wasn't garfield or the smurfs. If I had to make a bet though I would go with animaniacs.
I guess maybe there's some sorta physchological pattern in my blogs that I can't quite figure out. After all sometimes it feels like I go in circles with these things. And I know that they say the mind works in mysterious ways. Like all of sudden I'll here a song, or perhaps something will just hit out of the blue. And then I'll suddenly have something to blog about. Maybe I should stop thinking about finding stuff to blog about, and things will just flow. It's kinda weird but one day last week someone told me that they thought my blogs were preplanned, and I explained that they weren't. But ever since then I've been obsessed with trying to come up with topics before I start writing. It's strange how somehow one little comment like that makes the wheels in my mind turn. That kinda reminds me how they used to show in cartoons a hamster running in a person's head. I can't remember which character it was. Hmmm I doubt it was looney toons, it certainly wasn't garfield or the smurfs. If I had to make a bet though I would go with animaniacs.
The Road to Nowhere
Sometimes life is kinda strange. As humans if we totally hate structure, somehow even when we don't plan it, it happens anyway. I know you are probably like what the fuck is she talking about. But take me for example, every morning I come to work I have the same routine. After I come to work the first thing I do is check my email, and then I sign into blogger to write a blog. Even if I don't have any clue what I'm gonna blog about, like this morning. It's just a habit that I've gotten into.
Some habits are good and some are bad. And some I don't think are good are bad. Like I have this bad habit of playing with my hair. Some people have asked me if it's because I'm nervous but I do it all the time. It's either one of two things I'm either playing with the front, because no matter what it's never even. Or I'm playing with the back of my hair, because it drives me nuts. There's this one spot that curls the wrong way and it drives me nuts. I've tried moving the rest of the hair that way. Guess what then it'll curl the other way. Maybe you could say it's stubborn like the rest of me. Yes, I could work on being less stubborn. I've thought about it, but to be quite honest I don't want to. Let's face it, I'm proud of being stubborn. My stubborness has been with through thick and thin. Hey, it's driven me to do things my way. And to be honest I like things my way. And the more one will try to get to do things their way, the more determined I'll be to do things my way.
This is strange, it seems like most of the keys I've been typing have been with my left hand. For some reason, it feels a little unbalanced. It's kinda funny that I never noticed that before. It appears most of the more common keys are on that side. I'm surprised that they would have designed the keyboard that way. Maybe they just didn't give it much thought. I know I'm weird I just totally brought that up out of the middle of nowhere. It's kinda cool how in a blog you can change the topic out the middle of nowhere.
Some habits are good and some are bad. And some I don't think are good are bad. Like I have this bad habit of playing with my hair. Some people have asked me if it's because I'm nervous but I do it all the time. It's either one of two things I'm either playing with the front, because no matter what it's never even. Or I'm playing with the back of my hair, because it drives me nuts. There's this one spot that curls the wrong way and it drives me nuts. I've tried moving the rest of the hair that way. Guess what then it'll curl the other way. Maybe you could say it's stubborn like the rest of me. Yes, I could work on being less stubborn. I've thought about it, but to be quite honest I don't want to. Let's face it, I'm proud of being stubborn. My stubborness has been with through thick and thin. Hey, it's driven me to do things my way. And to be honest I like things my way. And the more one will try to get to do things their way, the more determined I'll be to do things my way.
This is strange, it seems like most of the keys I've been typing have been with my left hand. For some reason, it feels a little unbalanced. It's kinda funny that I never noticed that before. It appears most of the more common keys are on that side. I'm surprised that they would have designed the keyboard that way. Maybe they just didn't give it much thought. I know I'm weird I just totally brought that up out of the middle of nowhere. It's kinda cool how in a blog you can change the topic out the middle of nowhere.
Sticky Fingers
When I was a little kid we used to have this stone path in the backyard. I knew that there was an ant farm that lived under the stones. The reason I could tell was because I would always see them running back and forth from underneath there. And I was always curious towards what was going on underneath there. Being a child, and a curious one, maybe that's why I related so much to Curious George, I assumed there must have been lots of excitement going on under that rock. So one lazy summer afternoon, when I was bored, I decided to spend some time lifting the stone. It probably wasn't that much time, but to an impatient child it certainly seemed like a lot. Needless to say there really wasn't anything exciting going on underneath there. There were just more ants running around, maybe just a lot faster after I disturbed their stone. This probably won't surprise you much but I was pretty disappointed. As you can imagine I felt like I should have left well enough alone. After all I believed there was something exciting going on under there.
I know where am I going with this. If you have been reading my blogs, then you know that in my last song game I blogged about how I was curious about the lips from the Rolling Stones. I was always sure that there was this really exciting story behind them. After all they were really cool, and how could something that cool not have a really cool story. So needless to say I decided to google the Rolling Stones. First I found the fan site and the time line was way too much of a pain the ass to deal with. So then the next site listed was the stones page on wikipedia. I can't believe I didn't think of it first. I haven't really used the site much, but after finding the page I realized it would have been a good idea. Oh well it's always easy to say that in hindsight. So after flipping down the page for a minute or two I found a picture of their lips and clicked on it. Well I found out that it was originally just designed as a album cover, by an artist named John Pashe, in 1971 for Sticky Fingers. I felt like a kid that found out not that Santa was a fake, but maybe that he got to spend the rest of the winter in Aruba. On a positive note I found out something really cool about the band's name they named it after a Muddy Waters song. I don't even know who Muddy Waters are. It must be something else to look up on Wikipedia. I think I have another new addictive website. Looks like you may be getting a bunch of blogs on my finds on that website. As far the blog title, I figured I would give a tribute to the album that the tongue came from. Something logical for a change, are you happy? :P (I guess a sticking out tongue is appropriate way to end. To bad I didn't think of that before I did it. I'll do it again for good measure) :P
I know where am I going with this. If you have been reading my blogs, then you know that in my last song game I blogged about how I was curious about the lips from the Rolling Stones. I was always sure that there was this really exciting story behind them. After all they were really cool, and how could something that cool not have a really cool story. So needless to say I decided to google the Rolling Stones. First I found the fan site and the time line was way too much of a pain the ass to deal with. So then the next site listed was the stones page on wikipedia. I can't believe I didn't think of it first. I haven't really used the site much, but after finding the page I realized it would have been a good idea. Oh well it's always easy to say that in hindsight. So after flipping down the page for a minute or two I found a picture of their lips and clicked on it. Well I found out that it was originally just designed as a album cover, by an artist named John Pashe, in 1971 for Sticky Fingers. I felt like a kid that found out not that Santa was a fake, but maybe that he got to spend the rest of the winter in Aruba. On a positive note I found out something really cool about the band's name they named it after a Muddy Waters song. I don't even know who Muddy Waters are. It must be something else to look up on Wikipedia. I think I have another new addictive website. Looks like you may be getting a bunch of blogs on my finds on that website. As far the blog title, I figured I would give a tribute to the album that the tongue came from. Something logical for a change, are you happy? :P (I guess a sticking out tongue is appropriate way to end. To bad I didn't think of that before I did it. I'll do it again for good measure) :P
April 18, 2007
From Inside My Head
Disclaimer: I know all my blogs are from inside my head. When I was logging in I saw that someone had that as the title for their website. And no I do not consider it stealing because well it was the title of their whole blog and not just a blog. Maybe I am justifying myself, but I really don't care. After all it's just a silly blog. Perhaps at the the very least I should have read the blog, and I normally would. But today I was just feeling lazy. OK you are right I'm lazy most days. But lazy is such a negative word. I prefer procastrator. After all look how long I've put off finding a topic for this blog.
Hmmm that was a very long disclaimer, I probably should have hit return in there somewhere. How long is this blog gonna wind up being? Well if I went for that long without a subject in mind it could be awfully long. Let's face it, From Inside My Head could be anything. It's true usually the titles of my blog are usually way off. But the titles are usually so off the wall that it doesn't matter. The title of this blog could lead to some logical thought pattern for a change. I know who do I think I'm kidding. But then again how logical can you be if you are sitting there reading my blogs. Maybe I'm starting to taunt my readers too much, but then again it's not like I get paid for having readers. So it doesn't really matter. I know I'm obxinous, don't tell me that you are just realizing this now. And I know I can't spell either. I kinda learned that in first grade.
Boy was I tramatized by phonics as a child. None of it made any sense to me. Like I couldn't understand why ph sounded like f. To me that just seemed retarded. I can't remember all of them but I remember their were lots. Like that i before e except after c. It seemed like the only special thing about the c was to confuse the shit out of me. The only thing that confused me more than phonics was math. And I always hated my dad tell me that the only thing stopping me from being good at math was that I didn't like it. Maybe I should have told him that it just made me hate more. Yes I hated school, but I like high school. But that might just because I would hang out in the hallways instead of going to class. By the way in case you need to know white out does not work on report cards. In fact it works more like a highlighter. No wonder they let me use it, that high school secretary was one hell of a wiseass. C'est la vie, aah something else I remember from school, but I don't remember much else from french other than my teacher telling me that mine sounded like I was speaking english.
Hmmm that was a very long disclaimer, I probably should have hit return in there somewhere. How long is this blog gonna wind up being? Well if I went for that long without a subject in mind it could be awfully long. Let's face it, From Inside My Head could be anything. It's true usually the titles of my blog are usually way off. But the titles are usually so off the wall that it doesn't matter. The title of this blog could lead to some logical thought pattern for a change. I know who do I think I'm kidding. But then again how logical can you be if you are sitting there reading my blogs. Maybe I'm starting to taunt my readers too much, but then again it's not like I get paid for having readers. So it doesn't really matter. I know I'm obxinous, don't tell me that you are just realizing this now. And I know I can't spell either. I kinda learned that in first grade.
Boy was I tramatized by phonics as a child. None of it made any sense to me. Like I couldn't understand why ph sounded like f. To me that just seemed retarded. I can't remember all of them but I remember their were lots. Like that i before e except after c. It seemed like the only special thing about the c was to confuse the shit out of me. The only thing that confused me more than phonics was math. And I always hated my dad tell me that the only thing stopping me from being good at math was that I didn't like it. Maybe I should have told him that it just made me hate more. Yes I hated school, but I like high school. But that might just because I would hang out in the hallways instead of going to class. By the way in case you need to know white out does not work on report cards. In fact it works more like a highlighter. No wonder they let me use it, that high school secretary was one hell of a wiseass. C'est la vie, aah something else I remember from school, but I don't remember much else from french other than my teacher telling me that mine sounded like I was speaking english.
Hit Me With Your Best Shot...
Disclaimer: Ok what the hell... Let's play again... I know I haven't been doing it as much lately... because it seems to take up more time... But I can't think about what to blog about... And besides I like the dots... Yes I know I'm silly... But you are wasting time reading this drivel so you shouldn't talk... I'm sure you have something better to do with your time...
Here we stand... Close apart... Sleepless nights... Ahh another happy love song... yes i'm rolling my eyes... Someday love will find you... break those ties that bind you... I still love you... Seperate ways... trouble times... Oh this guy sounds really confused... His buddies should take him drinking and to a strip club... I know I know that's not gonna fix a thing... You sound just like a chick... Seperate ways... Love is gonna find you... Someday love will find you... You know I still love you... Sounds to me that they are making things too complicated... What do you mean I shouldn't talk...
I get up in the evening... I ain't got nothing to saying... Ain't nothing but tired... tired and bored with myself... Can't start a fire without a spark... the plight of the common man... Wanna change but don't know how... Can't start fire... Just Dancin' in the dark... The boss sometimes really knows what he's talking about... Come on baby the laugh is on me... In some ways he's a modern day bob dylan... Trying to write this book... ok he's a little less folksy... worrying about your little world falling apart... Just dancing the dark... And let's face folk has modernized a lot, too...
Are you going to Scarboro Fair... What's with the spices... Remember me to one that lives there... There we go with the spices again... Until I tried to type this song I didn't realize how much they mumble... Between the salt water... I don't think I heard that right... Parsely sage rosemary and thyme... It's not so much that they are mumbling but that they are singing over each other... Are you going to Scarboro Fair... She once was a true love of mine...
How can it be permissible... She compromised by principal... She's anything but typical... She powerful force... She used to look good... Now I find her simply irresistable... I just remembered didn't this dude die... Like a couple of years ago... he had this song and there was another one... I just can't remember the title now... simply irresistable... She's so fine... All mine... there's no other way to go... She's all mine... there's no other way to go... Sounds like this guy is pretty smitten... Now I find her simply irresistable... It's kinda sweet... There's no other way to go... Simply Irrestiable...
I won't be no beast of burden...But me...I don't know... beast of burden... You think I would have learned about trying to type mick's songs by now... stop smirking you wiseass... I won't be a beast of burden... hard enough... rich enough... Is it just me or is he drunk... this is actually live... actually he's probably stoned... the rolling stones... I wonder how they came up with that logo... I could google it and probably find out... maybe later... such a pretty girl... you can put me out on the street... Yup he's definetly stoned... I shrug it off... Shrugging things off is usually a good thing... I won't be your beast of burden... Ok I see why you were smirking before...
Here we stand... Close apart... Sleepless nights... Ahh another happy love song... yes i'm rolling my eyes... Someday love will find you... break those ties that bind you... I still love you... Seperate ways... trouble times... Oh this guy sounds really confused... His buddies should take him drinking and to a strip club... I know I know that's not gonna fix a thing... You sound just like a chick... Seperate ways... Love is gonna find you... Someday love will find you... You know I still love you... Sounds to me that they are making things too complicated... What do you mean I shouldn't talk...
I get up in the evening... I ain't got nothing to saying... Ain't nothing but tired... tired and bored with myself... Can't start a fire without a spark... the plight of the common man... Wanna change but don't know how... Can't start fire... Just Dancin' in the dark... The boss sometimes really knows what he's talking about... Come on baby the laugh is on me... In some ways he's a modern day bob dylan... Trying to write this book... ok he's a little less folksy... worrying about your little world falling apart... Just dancing the dark... And let's face folk has modernized a lot, too...
Are you going to Scarboro Fair... What's with the spices... Remember me to one that lives there... There we go with the spices again... Until I tried to type this song I didn't realize how much they mumble... Between the salt water... I don't think I heard that right... Parsely sage rosemary and thyme... It's not so much that they are mumbling but that they are singing over each other... Are you going to Scarboro Fair... She once was a true love of mine...
How can it be permissible... She compromised by principal... She's anything but typical... She powerful force... She used to look good... Now I find her simply irresistable... I just remembered didn't this dude die... Like a couple of years ago... he had this song and there was another one... I just can't remember the title now... simply irresistable... She's so fine... All mine... there's no other way to go... She's all mine... there's no other way to go... Sounds like this guy is pretty smitten... Now I find her simply irresistable... It's kinda sweet... There's no other way to go... Simply Irrestiable...
I won't be no beast of burden...But me...I don't know... beast of burden... You think I would have learned about trying to type mick's songs by now... stop smirking you wiseass... I won't be a beast of burden... hard enough... rich enough... Is it just me or is he drunk... this is actually live... actually he's probably stoned... the rolling stones... I wonder how they came up with that logo... I could google it and probably find out... maybe later... such a pretty girl... you can put me out on the street... Yup he's definetly stoned... I shrug it off... Shrugging things off is usually a good thing... I won't be your beast of burden... Ok I see why you were smirking before...
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